Single Speed Pirate

Shenanigans...

2012-01-26T14:17:00.000-08:00

Now those are some funny looking trees...

Cog-o-licious...

2012-01-24T14:34:00.000-08:00

I gave away my prize Phil Wood rear flip-flop hub to a friend as a graduation/b-day gift. I am really wishing I had kept it now, since I currently do NOT have a fixed gear mountain bike in my stable. There is something about a fixie and winter that mix well; like the ingredients of an Irish Car Bomb. Delicious and unmatched.

So I was paroosing the interweb searching for ideas when "WHAM"!!! I remembered the Tomicog. What a novel yet basic idea on how to enable the average Joe to run any 5 bolt disc hub as a fixed gear. My fingers did the walking as I instantly ordered an eighteen. I'll be like a kid on Christmas morning for the next week awaiting it's arrival!

Let's see...$30 Tomicog OR $200+ for a new rear wheel? TOMICOG! Just think of all the beer I can buy with the money I saved.

Fall Down, Build Up...

2012-01-21T17:14:00.000-08:00

As I waddle around my casa feeling trapped and helpless ,I've motivated just long enough to get my Trek Sawyer Steel SS built-up and ready to ride - even though I can't ride at the moment. I have that depressing feeling that one gets not unlike getting scuba gear on Christmas morning. I now have two newly built bikes and am gimped-up and cannot ride them. Total flippin' cock tease. I'm dying over here.

So I bought this frame because I love the lines, not because I like Trek (I really hate Trek). That and I had this sweet Niner Carbon fork that needed a home, which looks dead sexy on this frame. Rolling out the rest of the build I've got White Industries ENO cranks and Freewheel (32x18), White Industries hubs laced to Bontrager Duster rims, set-up tubeless with Specialized rubber. Running Ritchey Carbon Pro Rizers at the cockpit with Avid Juicy Sevens for stopping, Thomson Stem and Post, Salsa clamp, King Headset and my well worn-in WTB Silverado saddle. Had I been riding this beast on Friday I might still be in the game. Squishy forks get the best of me at times, OTB all the way. This stiffy might have saved my ass...

All in all I just felt the need to get back to the SS roots; Rigid and basic. Once I'm back at it, this is gonna be my daily driver. At least that's the plan today.

Tech'd Off...

2012-01-21T08:01:00.001-08:00

It was a great day to get out and sample some dirt on the new Air 9. The Manimal, Possun and Brad had just completed a few hours trail work on the Gunbarrel section at Landahl so I headed out to met them and sample the new trail. This would be the first ride on the Air 9, and I was super psyched.

I dropped into the Barrel Hub and onto Rim Job. As I headed in I was trying to figure out the suspension set-up (Reba XX) and get used to things. My front end was a bit softer than I like, but I went with it anyway. My brake levers have a bit less throw and the bike was a bit less weight. So far so good.

Once I found the crew it was game on. We spun around on various trails and took advantage of most techie obstacles enroute. Landahl is home to some hella-fun rock gardens that require great skill to ride clean. I can't say that I rode anything clean today, but I did have a super fun time. The Manimal was busting tricky rock drops and climbs on his fixie like it was butter.

At some point, make that many points, I crashed. Some stupid, some legit, but the last wreck I had caused me to go OTB and slam my left knee into a limestone slab so hard I almost threw-up. Of course I thought I was fine and told the fellas I'd catch up and to ride on. After a few minutes of catching my breath, I had to re align my bars, stem and one brake lever. Then I tried to mount my stead...to no avail. I could not pedal. My knee was toast. At this point I just started to hike out. I was pissed.

Minutes later the crew found me and we all rolled out together, me doing the one legged pedal. We still got in a good ride, too bad It was cut short by yours truly.

Did I mention The Manimal cracked his frame? Second one in six months...the MASHER!

Long story short, I'm on the couch for at least a few weeks with a bum knee, bummer! I hope the rest of you can make up for my lack of riding by riding a little extra in my absence. Cheers!

Frigid and Rigid...

2012-01-19T21:12:00.001-08:00

When it rains it pours and it's been raining bike frames and parts at the Pirates Lair as of late. It was only a few days ago that I finished my Air 9 Carbon SS Build. Today I started building up a Niner RIP 9 full suspension as a Single Speed but half way thru the build I wasn't feeling the love. I hung [that] bike on the rack and instead starting building this; a 2011 Trek Sawyer. Steel, Classic lines and an old school look had me at Hello. Yeah, shes a tank, but I'm used to that. I just want to see what I can do to make this beauty sail. This my friend is going to be a sexy machine. More to come...

Get Psyched...

2012-01-18T12:55:00.000-08:00

On my Top 5 Local Favorite Race List. This will be my 4th year doing this race and I'm so looking forward to it!

100%...

2012-01-18T12:33:00.000-08:00

I'd like to give a shout-out to the fellas at BikeSource for helping me get this build ironed-out...finally. It's been a few too many weeks of ordering little parts and getting this beauty dialed-in just how I want her. Billy worked his magic on my wheel set which needed some major help after the brutal beatings I pose on them. Farmer put up with me lallygagging around the shop and allowed me some space out of the cold to build her up. The Trail Asshole helped me figure out what it was in fact that I needed to transform the rig from (choke) geared to SS. Thanks Fellas, I do really appreciate your time and knowledge.

Now lets go ride, this bitch needs to taste some dirt.

90%...

2012-01-16T08:42:00.000-08:00

If I could finagle just thirty minutes out of my intense training schedule I'd have a complete bike to ride. It's just so hard between all of the babes at the gym, hookers and cocaine to make the time, seriously.

Dirt Church Tithe...

2012-01-15T10:50:00.000-08:00

Per a little bit of motivation by The Manimal and his new outlook on our selfish ways, I started my payout of Ride time vs. Trail Building time today at SMP. There was a huge crew of folks bench cutting the hell outta that place, and what was created is pure awesomeness.

The Red trail at SMP is just getting better, longer, harder and just stellar. I'm psyched that I was able to give a little time back. I do ride these trails regularly since they are in my backyard. Makes sense to get out and build when family and time allow. It was a good day to be out (60 degrees and sunny in January!). No complaints. I'll sleep easy knowing that I have been less selfish...at least for today.

Destroyed....

2012-01-14T21:15:00.001-08:00

I took my chances and headed out to see what the KC Sprints are all about. Sounded like a good time at a great venue, Buzzard Beach. The basic idea is to sprint for 500 meters on a fixie set-up on rollers (with the front fork mount). You pedal like a maniac trying to beat the guy that you are literally head-to-head with. I have been doing zero training and am an endurance guy. The sprint game is outta my league. I figured I'd show my mug and support the local event, even though Z was a no-show at The Darkness. I know that doors swing both ways...but I'm better than that.

As I mounted up the blue steed, Jones whispered to me "if you beat this guy I'll buy ya a shot". Well, that must mean something. As it goes the fella I was racing has been around the cycling scene for some time and is hard to beat. It was a close race, but I was destroyed.

So it goes. I was done and settled into one more Pale Ale as I watch some sweet racing by a handful of hipsters and various amazon women. Good times. I'll be back for sure.

Use The Bucket...

2012-01-14T16:41:00.000-08:00

Tonight, Get some...

Tough Guy...

2012-01-12T05:51:00.000-08:00

It's THAT time of year again. Be there.

Yard Sale...

2012-01-11T10:25:00.000-08:00

SRAM XO shifters - 2x10 set, excellent condition
$225
SRAM XO Rear Derrailleur, black, long cage, excellent condition, for 2x10
$200
SRAM XO Front Derailleur, high clamp, 34.9 for dual pull 2x10, excellent condition
$60
Stans ZTR Crest 29er Wheelset, Like New with rim tape and valve stems, UST (retail is $530)
SOLD
Continnental Race King 29x2.2 tubeless tires, like new
$30 each
Ergon GS1 grips, like new, black, lock on
$25
Fizik Gobi saddle, like new, black
SOLD
Reba XX 29er Suspension fork w/remote hydrolic lock out, Niner orange, 100mm, tapered
SOLD
Truvativ X9 cranks, p30, 2x, black with rings
$150
Kona Unit 2011 frame -size Large, white/black, near mint conditon, Single Speed, Disc only steel frame
SOLD
White Brothers Rock Solid Carbon 29er fork, excellent condition
SOLD
Groovy Cycles Luv Handle, black (big sweep custom bar)
SOLD
Avid BB7 Mechanical Disc Brakes, set, grey, used, calipers, pads and hardware, pair
SOLD
Thomson Elite 27.2 x 410 seatpost,, black
$45
Thomson Elite 27.2 x 310ish seatpost, black
$45
Gunnar Ruffian custom steel singlespeed frame, 18"+/-, disc or canti, for 26" wheels, needs paint but otherwise awesome frame
$200
Surly 1x1 steel fork, like new, newer model, disc or canti, black
$40
Hope 1 1/8" headset, topcap and race, anno blue
SOLD
Sette Carbon riser bar, excellent conditon
SOLD
Wheel - Mavic/Surly - Surly flip-flop hub laced to mavic rim brake rim, built by Dale, black, well used, 26"
$50
Mavic Crossmark 26x2.2 LUST tire, like new
$30
Race Face Duex stem, excellent condition, 110 x 12 rise??? for 31.8 bar
$20
Salsa Clamp, anno blue (for 27.2 post on steel frame??)
$10
Specialized Stem with adjustible shims (very nice) 1 1/8", 31.8 bar, 110 x adjust rise, like new
$40
White Brothers ENO single speed cranks, black- with Home Brewed Industries Titanium chainring, 32t
SOLD
Bontrager 26" front disc, tubeless ready race lite wheel, great condition, black
$40
WTB Rocket V team saddle with Ti rails, well used but broken in like a brooks!
$40
34.9 flip lock style seat clamp, black
$5
Ergon GA1 Enduro Lock-on Grips, team Green, Like New
$20
DT Swiss XR 4.20 Rims, good shape, 26", 32 hole
$20 pair
Specialized The Captain 2.2 Armadillo tires (pair), well used
FREE
Surley Tugnut, new
SOLD
Salsa Flip Lock Skewer, REAR. Black SOLD and Blue $10 (signs of wear)
On One Mary Bar, Silver $25
Schwalbe Big Apple 700c x 2.35 (29er) tires,
SOLD
Planet Bike 700c Fenders, NEW. includes mounting hardware (strap style, no frame eyelets required).
$20 pair
Blackburn Mtn Rack, black, used
$10
Topeak Kid Seat (mounts to included rear mount rack)
$40
Specialized 90's saddle, basic, FREE
Drop Bars cut down to bull horn style, FREE
Maxxis Crossmark 26x2.0 LUST, way used, FREE
Real brand cnc'd old school canti brake levers, silver/annodized blue, AWESOME, $50
Performance brand Tights, black with red reinforced knees, medium $5
Subaru Team Bibs, race cut med, black/blue $10
Cowtown Team Bibs, Med, New $40
Cowtown Team Winter Jacket, Large, good condition, $40
Race Face Evolve XC 30.9 post, New $20

Email me if you want any of these fine goods...
singlespeedpirate@gmail.com

The Darkness...

2012-01-10T09:19:00.001-08:00

Plastic Fantastic...

2011-12-30T15:15:00.001-08:00

If only you could see me now...doing my happy dance. 2012 is the year to try out Carbon. It took me way to long to realize how bad ass riding a 29er can be. I'm not going to sit around and let the plastic bike experience pass me by. I told myself that if I bought a new bike for 2012 that I'd actually start 'training'. How sweet would it be to have the Ethos Posse bring in the single speed 1-2-3 at every local XC and Endurance event for 2012. I have a feeling that The Bald Chimp and The Manimal wont mind if I join them...Now if I can only fulfil my commitment. Damn I hate really training; for real, the whole deal. Somebody hit me over the head with a 2x and wake me from this nightmarish reality.

Burnsey's P.O.V...

2011-12-28T07:53:00.001-08:00

I'm not sure why Santa did not bring me a $2,600 Carbon Mountain Bike Frame for Xmas. Seems like the logical thing to do to me. Rather, I was surprised with this little piece of gadgetry, the Countour Roam HD Helmet/POV Video Camera. I guess you're going to see more than just lame photos of my Pirate Adventures from here on out. I feel a winter night ride looming in the very near future. I wonder how well these suckers record in low light. My homework for this week is to find [that] out and report back here asap. Until then, I hope you can find some frozen trail to ride...the warm temps here in Misery are not allowing for much in the way of dry trail. What happened to all the snow this Winter?

Pirate cXc - Race No.1...

2011-12-21T10:43:00.000-08:00

I double-dare you... make that tripple.

Dear Santa...

2011-12-20T10:19:00.000-08:00

Carbon?

Steel?

It's a tough call. I'd love to go Carbon for my 2012 Race Machine. It seems to work for The Bald Chimp anyway... Here's what [he] had to say...

"Well……….I can let you test ride both if you want, although the SIR is set up monster right now, we are both the same size (from the waist up so fit should be close). Here are my thoughts and I’m like you an old steelie fan. I love the SIR, everyone should have one, it’s a great workhorse and the ride is brilliant. Not all steel is equal, a good nimble well designed 853 frame will ride circles around most (heavy) lower rent 4130 frames. I can’t stand the ride of a Karate Monkey for example. That said it took me nearly all year to warm up to the AIR and it really only came together for me at BT and its awesome. So light and sick fast, I think I wasn’t confident on it and now I get it. Now I want it to weigh sub 17 lbs so it is my quest to race rigid in 012 to shuck some weight. So what am I telling you? You need one of each."

I think one of each would be my first choice fo sure, great idea...but my kids need to eat. In reality, it would cost me more than double to go carbon. I'm wondering if it's really worth it. I do crash a lot, but I still have a few steel bikes around for crashing.

Heck, maybe I don't need a new bike, but please Santa...I've been a really good boy.

Ride In Peace...

2011-12-12T11:35:00.000-08:00

Timbo hooked me up with his Niner R.I.P. 9 frame to test drive. I've been wanting to try out a full suspension frame built-up single speed. Why you might ask? This does go firmly against the whole baisis of keeping it simple, but...

I want to go faster through rock gardens. I want to go off bigger drops. I want to sit on my saddle and hit bumps when I'm tired and not feel violated. I want to mix-it-up with some freeride/all mountain/XC style riding.

Soon I'll gather a few of the parts I'm missing to get this baby built. Then it's go time, full-on MONSTER TRUCK ACTION, ACTION, ACTION!!!

In Between The Lines...

2011-12-11T17:47:00.000-08:00

No doubt, Old Man Winter has arrived. Along with [him] the dreaded freeze/thaw cycle has begun - at every single trail within an hours drive of KC.
My experience at Swope just a few nights ago was great, the trail was as dry as a bone. We've had zero precipitation since, but now that temps are fluctuating below and above (but near) freezing, any daylight riding must be done first thing in the morning or you're getting muddy. I don't always have the fortune to choose my riding times, so I go when I can. Today that lead me on an quest to avoid pavement AND mud; a challenge indeed,

I had a few errands to run, so I loaded up my bike and gear and headed off to scout some potential trail. As luck had it, I found just that; a 2-3 mile loop of featured rogue trail that gave me just what I needed. There was single track, double track, logs, rocks, burmed corners, bumps, jumps, and great views. I envisioned a race here - with a few dozen fun loving, adventure bound, out-of-the-box thinking pals. All for fun of course, and for the shenanigans. Hmmm... I think it's gonna happen,,,

Up All Nitro...

2011-12-07T20:45:00.001-08:00

A good night always seems to end with good friends and good beer. The Up All Nitro Porter at 75th Street Brewery hit the spot after 2 hours of riding sweet single track in prime winter conditions at Swope. The P-ride was, in a sense, resurrected at a new local and with the few who were animal enough to rally.

Pyro, The Manimal, sCotter and yours truly mashed an out-n-back style assault on all that is bad-ass at Swope. I of course was sucking wind, which is far better than sucking ass; either way it was a hard ride but I'm trying to make a come back after the Thanksgiving debauchery. That meal sent me into a black hole of fatty, good for nothing food addiction; do I really need peppermint Oreos?

It's good to be riding again and get a little prodding from some fellas who don't enjoy lolly-gagging. Screw this freezing-ass cold weather...lets ride!

The Dirty Deed...

2011-12-04T17:26:00.000-08:00

The deed is done, my karma debt repaid and pride swallowed. I made a promise during a 'pay it forward' barter that I'd do a CX race this year, and today was that day. I had asked for feedback on which local race to do, and all fingers pointed towards Missouri State CX Championships (Boss Cross) at Raytown BMX. The course would be a mix of typical grass CX junk and some sweet pumpish style BMX course. Well, as it goes mother nature decided to rain on the parade and the BMX section of the course was no longer included. The grass course was a muddy mess as is standard for CX, with two barriers, an up climb to a pseudo log step-over and a mess of wet and concrete type mud. Temps were in the upper thirties as a guess and other than NOT having any type of gay-ass skinny tire bike, I thought I was ready to race. You know me though; no training other than fun rides with friends. Lately I've been traveling a ton and eating like crap, so it was hard to even see my shoelaces due to my increasing Buddha. But so it goes and I was here to have fun, and fun was had.

For months I've asked why the skinny tires? No one could give me a straight answer, but today I realized that the reason might be frame clearance as it relates to mud build-up. I am in no way interested in skinny tires, so I had to suck-it-up, and suck I did.
My weapon of choice, though I was told it was illegal, was my 26" Fixed gear Mountain Bike. I knew there was mud, and control in mud with a fixie is like none other. I thought I'd be solid, and I was - my control was good. I thought I'd be strong and able to sprint for 40 minutes.. Wrong-o! I had so much concrete mud built-up on my wheels and loaded into my frame that making forward progress was like trying to get a Catholic Priest interested in vagina. I was in dire straights and in the first 30 seconds of the race I dropped to DFL (and stayed there for the entire deal).

I can't say that I enjoyed it at all. The only fun part of CX is the spectators mocking and prodding the racers. This I did enjoy and as the crowd yelled 'faster' as we'd approach a downhill mud slide into a tight turn, it would get us psyched to rally. Each lap you could tell the roadies from the mountain bikers as [they] ate-mega-shit in the soupy mess at that corner, all whilst being heckled and demoralized by onlookers. Now that's racing!

I was slightly upset, make that very disappointed, at the non-beer hand-ups and non-beer drinking going on. Does shaving your legs also make your balls crawl-up, reverse turtle-head? For fuck sake - a fella gets thirsty out there!

I'm also curious why you see some of the most retarded-expensive bikes out on the CX course just getting trashed with mud? Seriously? Is this how you strut your wealth or do you just like banging your head against a wall? I don't get it. Why not masturbate with sand?

All in all I am glad that The Manimal talked me into racing, that I went for it and that I got my very first DFL in the books. Now that it's over with I'm going to settle into a cold and hoppy beverage as I dream about technical single track, dry tread, fat tires and sunshine.

Peat Awesome, one helluva guy who knows what riding bikes IS all about!

EDIT (a day later): All of my excitement of getting my first DFL (Dead Fucking Last) has since faded. Official results are posted. I succeeded in my typical race goal; Finish, Not Last (and top ten is always nice too). So there you have it. I'm thinking that someday, if I can work towards a superior level of fitness, I might have to try a CX race again. Of course that means a skinny tire bike, some kind of gay costume and pre-arranged beer hand-ups/mega-hecklers! I suppose it could be fun...
I should also mention that K-Rocket, Squara, Pyro, Stev-o and The Manimal All took podium spots during the event. Seems I'm the lone snail riding CX for Ethos these days, but when your good looking you don't need to be fast. JDoug was out too, racing two back-to-back events with style. I'm sure he missed the non-hand-ups as much as I did.

Jet Lag...

2011-12-01T12:03:00.000-08:00

Between the Thanksgiving Holiday and a work trip to L.A., I've been off the bike for way too long. I might be dying. I need to ride soon while the weather is good and before I turn into a fat blimp from all the airport food. I think I might be as fat as Santa by now with all of the crap I've put in my belly. I feel horrible. Please save me.

I did take a few minutes to hit the beach and get some fresh air...if that's what they call the air in L.A., fresh. I think it's about as fresh as the beach is clean. Here is an image that defines the my feelings of the place very well. Like a sad story...

Please get me home soon. Please let me go ride my bike on some sick KC single track. I miss you...and my riding bros too. We've got to get the P-ride back on schedule!

Tale of a Good Ride...

2011-11-28T22:06:00.001-08:00

P-dub came over last night. He's in town from Cali and we always plan some kind of shenanigans when were together. Tall Bitch wanted in on the action, and he too is always down for craziness; So the night began...

P-dub and I started the evening with some backyards skills course action. Conditions were grim, slightly muddy which made the skinnies and log rides wicked hard, slick and scary. I was egging [him] on to keep trying all of the stunts. I think there was only one really good crash before we heard Tall Bitch driving up the hill in Quadzilla (the 4x4 van monster travel machine) and we headed back to the house for refreshments.

Soon we were fueled with all we needed for an evening in the saddle. The three of us hit-up some nice dirt singletrack and gravel, eventually leading us to a nice little area with ample lumber and picnic tables that just screamed 'playground'. We moved things around and constructed a good little up ramp to two linked picnic tables and then a steep down back to earth. Many attempts were made until we started getting too cold, and we headed out for more single track goodness.

One small detailI forgot to mention is the fact that I loaned my only light unit to P-dub. I was doing the entire ride, by choice, sans light. Why not make things more challenging right? Next time my light dies on the trail I will be one-up on those who never train for it.

I think all said and done we rode for around 2 hours in the sub-freezing temps. We had a great time - it was good to see ol' P-dub. The post ride refreshments were excellent and after chatting it up into the wee hours, we called it a night. Riding bikes is stupid fun.

Thanksgiving in Photos...

2011-11-28T08:16:00.000-08:00

I had a wonderfully relaxing week in Colorado with my family and friends for the holiday. Non-bike related so I'll save you the torture of words, but here are a few of many images that describe our adventure. Cheers!

Trick Fixed...

2011-11-21T09:24:00.000-08:00

I have a few pals into riding what they call Trick Fixed.

I think I'm liking the idea, might have to give it a try.

Might have to get one of these...

Be Skinny, Live FAT...

2011-11-21T08:25:00.000-08:00

I got the first of many NEW ladder bridges finished and installed in the Backyard Skills Trail over the weekend. The previous bridge at this location was the first one built about four years ago, and had broken last week due to age (and The Manimal being so beastly riding it). Just kidding on The Manimal part, but he did ride [it] more than any of you jerks.

So, here she is. A little wider, a little less steep but solid. The leaves off to the side give the illusion of safety, however it's a good two foot drop to a pile of random, leg-crunching rocks below. Just keeping it real.

In the photo below you can see a few of the other features we've got in the yard; The Log Skinny, Long Ladder Bridge and Ghetto Teeter. I really want to pimp this place out, get some new stuff built and some pumpish features to keep the flow. Winter is here. Time to build trail!

Backyard Skills Rebirth...

2011-11-18T17:11:00.000-08:00

The Backyard Skills Trail is now a whopping 4 years old. I had constructed all of the wooden features out of scrap lumber, much of which was not treated. In short; the stuff is showing it's age. Today I started to rebuild. Here is half of the first up/down skinny that I hope to install this weekend. I'm planning to rebuild and add new features as I can over the winter so that we have some sweet stunts for spring. If you have any treated lumber you want to get rid of, send it my way (leftovers from that fancy new deck?) If I can get a dump truck load of dirt I'll also be adding a pump track. If you have any ideas for free dirt, let me know!

Fixie Friday @ BuRP...

2011-11-18T13:31:00.000-08:00

Friday was a good day. My friend GB called and asked if the kids could come over for a play date. I said sure. Justin called and asked if I could come out and play. I said sure.

Burnsey approaching the hard coner on Highline

We met at BuRP for a short lap of the good stuff. The day was perfect for riding, a great change from the freezing cold ride a few nights ago. The wind was howling but inside the canopy of the trees it was perfect. Justin is getting stronger by the day and was enjoying a little more play time on the hard rock challenges that BuRP is known for. We did the Wagon loop then headed over and up to the East Side, dropped back into Little Moab, under Martha Truman and climbed out to finish our ride on Highline; the beast of them all. We played around a bunch on the technical stuff. If we did not send something the first time we'd try again and again until we were either totally denied or able to send.

Justin on one of the many rock playgrounds
on the North section of Highline

At some point I realized that I was running way short on time to get back to meet the babysitter, so we started rolling faster to get back to the cars. Of course that's when Justin blew his rear tire; what looked to be a 1" tear ended up being two holes. We were able to toss in a plug and let the Stans Sealant do the rest and we were back up-and-going in seconds. We made it all the way out of the trails but when we hit the pavement, the plug shot out of the tire and it was like the fourth of July; Stans was shooting everywhere (but eventually sealed). We made it back to the cars without another repair stop.

Justin refusing to take any Sally-lines

I am still feeling like a chump, riding slow and poorly. Must be something in the air, but I still have hella-fun. The bike felt good, the ride was good, the company was good. Thanks GB for giving me the time, Thanks Justin for the motivation.

Ice Cubed...

2011-11-17T12:22:00.000-08:00

Holy crap! Temps here in KC have dropped! It's full on winter temps, but with no snow or rain the trails are in perfect condition for riding. You've just gotta man-up to get out and take advantage.

Last nights P-ride was chilly business. It did not feel too bad as we geared-up to roll-out, but by the time we actually got rolling, the thermometer was dropping to as a guess - the twenties. The Manimal, who's named not only for his grizzly riding style and fearless go for it attitude, but for his layer of man-fur that keeps him warmer than the average man. Tonight was no different; he was in shorts and summer riding shoes. I on the other hand was prepared for blistering cold and still ended up with frozen fingers and toes towards the end of our 3 hours ride.

We thought it would be a good idea to start off the evening by riding a few laps on the backyard skills course. The Manimal was on top of his game while The Kid, Billy and I were having more falls than success. Here we have The Kid riding the Stone Skinny with a foot out for balance, a tricky little obstacle.

The Manimal hit the Log Skinny with success from both directions, after almost OTB'ing it at least once. Here's video evidence.

We finally head out with a few new objectives for the night, first being a ride up some steep switchbacks that we normally only ride down. We were surprised at how doable they were, though we did not send them perfectly, it's obvious that they will go. At this point The Kid is having pedal issues; coming un-clipped on every Log-hop or rock obstacle and decides to head back for repairs. In his absence the rest of us do a loop of sweet single track and then rendezvous with The Kid, only to ride the switchbacks a second time.

At this point my legs go bye-bye. We've been out an hour and I am already riding like a chump. It is what it is so we keep going. We hit some steep climbs and one of the potential future Pirate cXc courses. More hills and were back on rogue trail. We eventually get to the fast wide single track once again and play around on a few log crossings, log skinnies and technical climbs. When there's only four of us riding, it allows for a lot more horsing around and less hammering. I like that.

So now we'd been out two plus hours and were all getting cold. Time to head back home and call it a night. We arrived back at the lair at near midnight. Wow, we'd been out a while! All good times must come to an end, and even though the bonfire was prepped and Hot Tub ready for bodies, we called it a night after swilling a few barley pops and talking shop.

I had a helluva time sleeping last night. The P-ride kick-my-ass, hard. I am hurting. I feel like I got run over by a train and then beat with a lead pipe in a dark alley...or maybe it had something to do with riding my rigid single speed on all those rocks...

Luv and Hate...

2011-11-14T09:57:00.000-08:00

My new Groovy Cycles Luv Handles arrived over the weekend. I am super psyched to give these suckers a test ride. They are pretty bitchin'. I'm thinking the comfort factor is going to be at an all time high, especially running a rigid fork.

On a side note; I mounted-up the CX tires that Dirt Dobber gave me. I HATE SKINNY TIRES! Do I need to say it again? As you can see, they look mega-stupid on my 29er. I've already de-mounted those suckers and am going to pay them forward. Skinny tires remind me of elitist, smooth legged girly-boys. I just can't go there.

Instead, I mounted up a set of Specialized The Captain Grid UST (2.0 rear, 2.2 front). Now [these] are some real man tires! I'm all kinds of ready for winter conditions with the Cappy's.

I do still plan to follow through on racing a CX race before the season's over. I'll just be doing it on a mountain bike instead of a roadie-bike-on-steroids. You're allowed to bunny-hop those dumb barriers right? I prefer to stay on my bike (because I can).

Lumber Jacked...

2011-11-11T05:50:00.001-08:00

Last night my legs exploded all over the trail. Maybe they imploded. Whatever happened they hurt like a mofo this morning. The Kid and I went for a good 3 plus hour ride in the dark last night. We started out playing on the backyard skills trail; riding the skinnies, rock obstacles and teeter. Doing [that] stuff by headlamp is pretty insane. I mostly sucked, but it was still fun. Eventually we decided it was time to get in some mileage. The Kid had already been out for at least an hour scouting trial to see if anything was dry enough to ride, and when he rolled-in without a muddy bike, I knew it was game-on. Heading down the Lawrence hill is always a slap-in-the-face in winter months. The cold crisp air, cooler and cooler with every mph gained and foot of elevation lost. By the bottom you're frozen, not even close to being warmed up. Before you know it you're looking at a solid climb up and into the singletrack. After another ten minutes our bodies had warmed up, but the temperature was falling fast.
The Kid is always good for some horsing around, and so it goes. We'd stop and ride over, hop over or just fall over Logs that we otherwise might ride around. We'd try to run fallen trees as skinnies. I mostly crashed a lot and just tried to keep up; it was one of those rides. I just never got my legs and was hurting the whole time, yet still had a good time fo sho.

One of the 4,268* logs on the P-ride loop

Post ride; what else to do on a chilly night but crack open some brewsky's and sit in the hot tub under a full moon and talk bikes, racing and training. I really need to train. I hear that helps.

Sorry all you bitch-ass-bitches missed out. I'm sure these hard rides make you stronger...or so I'm told.

Sand Loop...

2011-11-09T21:56:00.000-08:00

This Weeks Pirate Night Ride was postponed. Bummer but so it goes; we needed the rain. Tonight (Thursday) we will do a P-ride with a bit of a flair. Due to wet trails, we will be headed off scouting some good future race course options for the upcoming Pirate cXc Series. This series will be a blend of XC and CX style racing, at night with courses that are good for both bikes types. More info to come in the following weeks. The Pirate cXc Series will bridge the racing season gap between XC and CX, so welcome to year round racing!

Moving on... last night I could not keep myself off the bike. My cousin Brad caught word that the LRT was dry, that he had a new light system he wanted to test out on the trail and there was a full moon. I was totally IN. I drove to Lawrence around 8:30 to meet Brad for a good ride on the Lawrence River Trail. This trail is super fun, smooth and fast. Brad must have been sneaking in some ride time recently because his pace the entire loop was rock solid. He gave me a tour of the new Sand Loop, which was good training for CX with all of the sand pits and cornering. The trail was perfectly tacky, unlike I'd ever experienced there before. Even with the monsoon rains we'd had the past two days straight, the only water we encountered was the creek crossing, and that's because it's a creek. The moon was rocking, the air crisp, and the trees along the river are flippin' HUGE! I forgot how awesome the trees are.
After the ride I headed home to enjoy the moon, stars and a dip in the hot tub. Man, what a fun night. Just what the doctor ordered.

Thanks Brad for the motivation. It was a great pseudo Pirate ride after all!

Full Moon, Giant Trees, Crisp Air and Dry Trail!

Trouble Cometh...

2011-11-08T13:12:00.000-08:00

I've gone and done it, opened my big mouth and made a deal with the Devil. The one and only Dirt Dobber was giving way some of his old cycling junk. I chimed in and said that if he'd hook me up with some CX tires, that i would do a CX race this year. I guess he really wants to see me suffer because these sweet Maxxis tires arrived, hand delivered today.Well, I guess I'm going to have to pick a good, MTB style course in the upcoming months, preferably on a cold, rainy and mud filled day to get my CX on, because I said I would... and I'm good for it. Tires were all I needed to get my Monstercross on the course, and so it goes.

Recommendations for the most bad-a$$ race around KC would be appreciated.

Headed out to get an appropriate CX uniform now! Cheers!

Another Day, Another Bike Build...

2011-11-07T09:53:00.000-08:00

I'm not sure why it is exactly that I am so OCD about what components I choose to ride. I just have to have certain parts on my bike that I trust, look great, perform and keep me happy. To me it's about piece of mind. To you I might just be nutty. I just cannot buy a pre-built bike. I 'd have to change every component.

So this is the first of many posts pertaining to my 2012 race bike build. Below are the first of a handful of new toys I will be running next season, and as I get the bike built-up I'll post photos, and as I get to ride the completed bike I'll give feedback on how things are or are not working. Below are a few goodies I have en route and am anxious to get my dirty little fingers on.

White Brothers Loop 29er Suspension Fork. I've always loved WB's products. I've had two of the old Magic forks in the past and currently run the Rock Solid Carbon on one of my single speed steeds. Love them all and hope that all of the hype with regards to the new Loop are true. If so I will be one happy camper.

White Industries ENO Single Speed Cranks. Simply the best, most simple single speed crank on the market. Runs on the old square taper BB with a splined chainring interface. I currently run a set of these that I bought eons ago from Cameron Chambers. Still takes a licking and keeps on ticking. Bomber and classy.

This time however I'm going to try out a Homebrewed Components Ti Chainring. Pimp, perfectly round and solid. Built to last. I'm going Black crank arms and naked Ti ring. Yummy.

And last but not least coming in a brown box this week are a set of the Groovy Cycleworks Luv Handles. I've been wanting to try out a pair of these custom bars for years, and finally have them coming. More sweep than an average riser, less sweep than a Mary Bar. This will help with elbow and wrist strain for sure. It's going to be perfect. The one I have coming is black. No need for Snake Print here boys...

Double Duty...

2011-11-06T15:22:00.000-08:00

Today I made up for my crap day at Swope. I got a load of housework done, much needed. Then the entire Pirate Clan suited up for a ten mile ride out to watch the Boulevard Cup Cyclocross action at Stump Park. The Mill Creek Trail is an easy paved ride next to the creek and woods, great for the whole family. We saw many friends at the race and heckled/cheered on a few of the ladies; Sarah who got 2nd and Karen in 4th. Nice work!

We also ran into Steve-o who took 2nd in the old fart class, and T-Donn was gearing up for the fast group - though I heard later that he had a mechanical early in the race that pretty much closed the podium door.

The Pirate Posse

After a good lunch, haircut and some time with my boys I headed out for a quick pre-dinner lap at SMP with Justin, Sarah and Nick. This was a last minute deal for me because I had dinner plans and was not going to ride, but with rain forecasted for the next two days...I just had to get out and force my wrecked ankle back into go mode. It worked, and at least right now, I am in minimal pain and can walk easily to and from the beer fridge. The ride was super good, trails tacky and fast, and my sweet technical outerwear worked like magic.

Team Lumberjack

Now I'm just keeping fingers cross for the Wednesday Night Pirate Ride to be a go, though the weatherman is calling for two days of rain before, and a low of 31 on ride night. Argh! Winter is coming fast, better ride faster!

Tick-Tacky-Toe

2011-11-05T12:04:00.000-07:00

Had a good shit-eating time at Swope with Cameron, Travis and Garet. Those three had already done a lap at BuRP in which Cam mentioned crashing like 400* times. I guess the tires were not hooking-up on all of the leave covered rocks. I was ready to get some riding in with my good pals and keeping my fingers crossed that this was going to be the warm-down version at Swope. Usually these fellas mash my d*%$ in the dirt so I was going to have to do whatever it took to keep up.

The Man, The Myth, The Legend

We rolled out and into the good old Woochuck Run first thing, moving pretty good but at a comfortable pace. It usually takes me a solid half hour to warm-up, and I was hurting a bit but the fellas were in it for a good time, not to beat any records. Cam was on my wheel and we were jibber-jabbering it up as we rolled into 8-pins. I dabbed a million times, feeling all gumby-like and not having an on day. We continued into phase four and were enjoying the fun down hilly section with the nice bumps for good air time. Wanting to play a bit I chose to cross-up my bars on the last big hit and landed slightly tilted, burped my rear tire, grabbed too much front brake and nose-wheelied into a tree. That was crash number one for me, the first of many. It seemed to be the theme of the day.

We did make a stop to play at Marci's playground and the Whales Tail. I tried to ride up one of the 2' rock drops only to crash, requiring tools to fix my bike. Cam was having a lot of fun since he has been riding a bit more of this style stuff since his move to Colorado. Here is a clip of Cam on Whales Tail. Not as impressive as it is in person.

We then headed across the road and onto Woodchuck Run once again. This is a technical section of trail with many rock obstacles and a few variations with drops or weird but cool features. Garet at one point crashed and required tools to fix his bike. I once again crashed hard just after the surfboard, going OTB somehow and crunching the lights outta my ankle. I could barely get back on my bike and make it off the trail and back to the car. I'm not sure what my problem was, but I was THE shit-circus of this ride. Kind of a bummer when you had hopes of riding hard, but at least I was with friends and they are good at just brushing it off as another ride with Burnsey. Thanks for putting up with my freak show excuse for a ride.

I am so looking forward to this ankle healing and getting back out on my bike and riding it like I know what the hell I'm doing. The Swope ride was embarrassing. We all have our off days.

Alone in the Dark...

2011-11-03T20:39:00.001-07:00

This weeks Pirate ride was a no-go due to some cold-ass temps and rain, rain and more rain. We were in dire need of the moisture so all was good, but I was in dire need of some time riding time too. Thursday night came around and the weather had been bomber all day. Though night had come, the temps were still bearable. After lolly-gagging around a bit after getting the boy's to bed, I finally motivated at 9:00 p.m. to layer up for a two hour ride in the dark, alone. Night rides in the woods alone are one of my favorite things to do. The solitude and crispness of the night air, the quiet darkness, the uneasy feeling of something or someone around the next turn when you hear leaf rustling not far off. I just love it.

A few things I've learned from my lone-ranger night-rides; be prepared, be prepared and be prepared. You don't want to be lost in the woods, have a mechanical that you cannot fix, a light go out or crash your brains out when solo and far from help. Just using some common sense will get you a long way (not just in riding bikes, but in life, generally speaking). I was prepared, I was psyched, and I was dialed. It was a great ride, good times had and not once did I have to do the 'double-take'; was that a cereal killer hiding behind that long' rubberneck maneuver.

Winter is fast approaching. Time to get the Fixie primed for some good old fashioned Wudchuck and Pirate rides. Man, if you can stay psyched, winter is not that bad for riding. Staying psyched is key. Do it.

Arkanthaw...

2011-10-31T07:31:00.000-07:00

With Fall comes the cool air and bright colors. I’m reminded of my roots; climbing rocks and living outside, taking it all in. This weekend I took the family down to Arkansas to enjoy a weekend of hiking, rock climbing and camping with some friends. It was nice to take a few days off from riding and enjoy some slow moving fresh air, and to see my boys running around getting dirty.

Five hours in the car is a long time when you have two little dudes always craving attention, but my wife and I managed to make it happen with minimal damage. In true Pirate fashion, the little guys have the road-trip-pee-bottle technique down to a science; no stopping. We brought more than enough gear to make a comfortable campsite with all the luxuries you’d expect with the V-dub so close. Our destination was HCR (Horseshoe Canyon Ranch), a great little Dude Ranch in the heart of the Ozarks that houses some of the best sandstone cragging in the state.

We had some good friends to share our adventure; The Dory clan, The Manimal & Bit and Ranski & son. We’d wake up to the bitter cold mornings, make some coffee and breakfast, then hike up to the crag. The sun felt o-so-good beating down on the orange and gray rock as we climbed from route to route. The little fellas climbed and played in the dirt. Life is good.

Our evenings went fast as the sun dropped beneath the forested landscape around 7:30, and we’d crank out a group dinner then relax around the fire. Smore’s were made over the hot coals, and fishing stories told. We even made a trip over to the Barn where inside you can find an indoor climbing wall, Slackline and Speleobox. The Speleobox was a hit with the kids, but It took me a little bit of time to get past a fear of small, cramped dark places. You see, the S-box is a Cavers delight. A multi-level, crawl-through caving practice; you go in one hole about 18” x 24”, wiggle around in the dark through a maze of drops, squeezes and unrelenting corners until you pop out the other side, some 15 minutes later. Spooky to say the least. HERE is a video of a Speleobox in use in the daylight. True form is to do it in pitch black.

So to keep this short and sweet; we had a great time, climbed some rocks, saw some wildlife, traveled, ate at Andy’s Frozen Custard, Drank Beer, Hiked, camped and had a great time.

Now I’m ready to get back on the bike for some good cold weather, fixed gear mountain bike madness!!!

Down with OTB...

2011-10-27T12:37:00.000-07:00

Last nights P-ride was a good one, a little weird but fun as usual. A good crew showed to ride; Pyro, The Manimal, Coletrain, Cliff, Gabriel, Billy and Farmer. I had a bit of anxiety about the ride happening due to forecasted temps going from 80+ on Monday to near freezing Wednesday night, and a 50% chance for rain. Well the rain came in the a.m. and did not even come close to even knocking the dust of the trail, and the temperature was 54 degrees when we rolled out, nearly perfect for a good ride in the dark. It felt cooler than 54, like 44, but we were all prepared and stayed plenty warm.

Tonight was a special night for Pyro. He was breaking in his new Single Speed. I am overjoyed that he built-up such a sweet ride, and is psyched to escape the distraction of gears (at least for his 'winter training'). Six out of the eight riders tonight were running one gear, a glorious thing indeed. Four of us were still in recovery mode from the BTepic race over the weekend, and were dragging ass but still having fun. Coletrain was being his usual impatient self and seemingly annoyed with my choice of routes, kept saying 'lets go' and 'can we get back on the normal trails'. Well, I like Coletrain and enjoy riding with him, but this is my gig and I was gunning for an adventure. The Manimal was in the same adventure mode and when I said 'Ya wanna try some new rogue/vague/un-rideable shit'?...and he was all in.

We deviated from the home loop to find ourselves lost in the middle of nowhere. I was not lost, but no one else knew were the f&%k we were, and that's just how I like it. Some of the 'trail' we rode was nothing more than a faint line in the tall grass; sometimes not even that, but the kind of trail you just Use The Force to navigate.

Leading the ride, I always try to call out any dangerous obstacles to those behind me. I think I yelled 'log' about 3,879* times last night. I also mentioned as we crested a short but steep climb that there was a double log on the descent that was a sure thing if you were into OTB (Over The Bars). I guess Pyro was game, because he took a good dive, denting his helmet pretty good as his head impacted the earth. This time I did not laugh. I had done the exact same maneuver the day before. OTB at night but no injuries. We continued on our wild path of craziness, moving faster and faster until I too took a good spill. My front end washed-out on me on a left turn. I too went OTB. I remember things going slow-motion. My face impacted the dirt, just past a large rock. My bottom lip felt stretched down under my chin as my lower teeth acted as a bulldozer; scraping the surface and filling my mouth with debris. I thought for sure I was going to be pretty f&%ked up, but after spitting for a few minutes I realized that I'd only scraped up my face and inner lip a bit. Nothing to keep us from continuing our crusade.

We pressed on and eventually, after what a few of the fellas said 'felt like we would never stop climbing', we reached some fast, flowing and familiar single track. At this point Pyro was claiming to be ready for beers, so we headed back to the Pirates Lair 'the shortest route' to toss back a few around the fire. The short route to me always means the shortest way via the best trails. We hit the ridge trail that the Manimal and I like so much and made it to the Lawrence climb minutes later.

The four of us who had raced over the weekend were hurting, or at least I was, and the climb back up to the house seemed oh-so-painful. The hoppy beer that Cliff had brought was a fine treat to finish off a good 18 miles of riding, and the fire was warm and cozy. Pyro yelled from afar that he was leaving, and I thought WTF, he said he wanted to get back and pound beers? Oh well... The married life will get you at times. Understood.

Thanks for coming out to ride fellas. Good times as usual. See you next week.

BT Epic 2011 - Race Report...

2011-10-24T11:07:00.000-07:00

I’d heard of the Berryman Trail, the BT Epic race and all of the stories that go along with it. I had been looking forward to a handful of great endurance races this season and after missing out on Burning at the Bluff, I just HAD to try my best to get a spot in the BT Epic. It’s been busy times around my house and getting the kitchen pass was going to be difficult, but somehow, even with a billion hiccups along the way, I was out the door on Friday morning to pick up The Manimal, Justin and Drew to head south for just shy of 60 miles of good riding and (2) nights of sleeping under the stars. The Vdub Express is a killer road-trip machine and we enjoyed a comfortable 4.5 hour drive to Bass River Resort, home for the weekend.

Justin, Drew, Burnsey, The Manimal & Sarah

There was a huge crowd of riders at this event. With some big cash payouts up for grabs, you knew it was going to truly be an epic race. After arriving we established camp, suited-up and headed out for a pre-ride to warm our legs. For some jack-ass reason we followed The Manimal UP the start of the race course; a 3.2 mile uphill gravel slog, then into nice flowing single track. Why we did the initial hill I don’t recall. It really sucked the life out of my legs. I should have planned a better warm-up, but so it goes and we went. We rode a bit, had enough and headed back to camp to eat dinner and chat with our pals as they arrived.

The Kid

The Vdub Express

Seems like all the cool cats were there. We told all kinds of fishing stories to many faces; Shoffy, The Bald Chimp, Pyro, Old Man Winters, Timbo, Sarah, Dr. Dover, Gabriel and many others. Everyone was ready for the race and psyched for the 8:30 start the next morning, even as temps were dropping into the low 30’s.

Mass Start

Morning came and we dawned our tight pants and team colors. The crowd of almost 300 racers lined up and we were off. The fast group broke off the front early and were out of sight in no time. I was mid pack doing my thing, trying not to blow-up and maintaining a steady pace on the long-ass climb. I was feeling pretty good, passing granny-geared folks along the way. When I made it to the single track it was already man-train-city and moving fast wasn’t going to happen until this thing derailed. Feeling slightly bored at the current state of affairs, I made the best of it by log hopping and playing on features as we went along.

Burnsey Rolling...

Checkpoints/aid stations were at the 11, 20 and 40 miles markers (approx.). At 11 miles I went through the aid station w/o stopping. I was still great on water and nutrition so there was no need. The trail from here to the 20 mile mark was totally awesome! Deep bench cut trail on steep hillsides that would weave back into deep drainage's and out again, then onto rolling hills through the changing leave. Pure bliss and fast rolling, awesome. I really enjoyed this section and was moving very well.

Justin, Man Style (one gear)

After the 20 mile checkpoint the trail changed into something like this; long ass climb, descent, long ass climb, descent, repeat. I was getting worked like a minimum wage job. My knees hurt, my legs hurt and if I were riding naked you’d think I had the biggest, most swollen clitoris you’d ever seen. I was starting to fade into the chump-zone, a point at which you are not sure if you should stop and just die in the woods, keep going or what. I‘m a lover of pain and just kept on trucking, though at a slower pace…much slower.

Pete, being Awesome - 3rd Single Speed

Pyro, Probably lost in the woods

At the 30 mile mark I stopped to grab my zip-tie (you needed 4 of these, in different colors to prove you made it to all the checkpoints) and with Luck, Micah was there handing out special brownies. I needed the special fuel and stuffed one giant mass of chocolate goodness down my throat. This was the fuel and mood change that gave me the juice to roll on to the last checkpoint.

Proof I was there...and that I crash my bike on ocasion

As I looked for Dana to hand off my goods, I was surprised to see my back-up hander-upper being Shoffy. He hooked me up (unfortunately not with beer) and I was off to finish the last 16 miles and get my drink on. Shoffy said this last section was single speed friendly and so I was psyched to check it out. Indeed it was friendly and super nice trail. I enjoyed this last bit before the 6 miles of gravel back to camp, and once on the gravel had a solid pace and enough energy to get me to the finish line without being totally dead. I’m surprised I wasn’t DFL, my legs sure felt like death, knees too. But, it was a good day in the saddle and I did succeed in my usual goal; Finish, not last.

The Bald Chimp - 1st Single Speed

The Manimal - 2nd Single Speed

Post race food was BBQ and Beer, perfect. The KUAT crew (Beau & Luke) provided free beer for the event (thanks!) and most peeps seemed to tie-one-on at race speed. Awards were given, raffle was done and the bonfire started. Those few who could hang did, and Pete Awesome made short work of trying to rehabilitate the tired-ass folks around the fire with his usual antics; this time being a made-on-the-spot-MacGyver-style beer bong. He taunted the crowd and pressured at least a dozen to toss down a cold one. When folks were saying no, Pete would just shoot one himself to keep the games going. A true sport!

Bonfire!

Pete Awesome doing his thing...to The Kid

To wrap things up- The Bald Chimp, The Manimal and Pete Awesome rolled in at 1-2-3 in the single speed game (the only important field really). Pyro got took a wrong turn with a crew of fast guys only to loose 30 minutes. The Kid was out there riding hard, but we don’t really know what happened in the end, other than he was feeling really good. Timbo and Kevin made it through looking solid. Sarah, Justin and Drew all rolled in before me. In general we had a great time among friends, got in a good and painful ride and walked away with two podiums for Ethos. The Old Man took home the cash. I hope I ride that hard when I grow up. Not too sure who all the other fast fellas were, so check the link to the results if you care (because I don't).

The Bald Chimp Following Protocol - Post Race Hydration

Next year I will be doing this race again, and you should too. Results were posted fast on-site, trails were marked well and the course was great. Killer good time!

Results are HERE AND Photos are HERE (Thank You!)

Business Time...

2011-10-21T17:38:00.000-07:00

Night Ride Highlights...

2011-10-20T13:25:00.001-07:00

Seems like just yesterday it was 80 degrees and I was sweating my arse off trying to keep up with farmer on a lap at BuRP. Last night was a far cry from 80, it was in the 30's, and most of the usual Pirate Ride suspects crawled up in their shells. It was only Justin and I who dared take on the extreme temps to get our ride on, and ride we did.

A more casual than usual start sent us off wandering around in the dark for a few hours of adventurous riding. We skipped a fair amount of the real a$$ kicking climbs and baby-head infested trail to enjoy a loop of the best of the best. We stopped many times to retrace our failed steps at an obstacle to try it again, learning how to achieve the highest level of pure awesomeness there is. Like I've mentioned before, the P-ride is full of log hopping. There are so many dang logs that if you can't hop one, you get left in the dust. We made sure to get our skills dialed-in, even trying a few no-goers that were way off the deck and way out of our league.

At one point we stopped at the stone wall ride, and I pressured Justin into trying it one two many times, all with the confidence builder of me spotting him on the sketchy side. I failed in my duties only to seemingly help him eat the pavement hard, and his knee took the brunt of the fall.

Not skipping a beet Justin wanted to just 'ride it off' and so we went on. It was a chilly night, our fingers and toes were starting to feel that sting of winter. We headed home for a beer and some small talk before we called it a night.

With the BTepic just a few days out, I really hope his knee heals quick. I feel really bad about it. Much worse than I felt when we found this new kick-stand for my bike; a partial deer leg; kinned to the hoof and looking gnarly. We had to be kids and mess with it just long enough to get a photo and a good laugh. That is why I enjoy riding bikes...the foolery of it all, and a laugh to remind me that it's all in good fun.

6 Days...

2011-10-17T09:56:00.000-07:00

...until the one and only Berryman Epic Mountain Bike Endurance Race. I guess it's never too late to sign-up and start training. I'm looking forward to my last race of the season as I hear the BTepic is a blast, that the after party is killer and the Pirate Booty is never ending. The Manimal will be coming over to do a little pre-race bike prep this week to make sure our SS rigs are dialed-in for 56 miles of single track in Missouri's Ozarks. I'm pretty psyched about this race, make that any long race at a venue I've never been. Fall has come and the leaves are down, the sounds in the woods are crisp as winter approaches. With 6,000+/- feet of elevation gain, this should be a good time. Hope to see you there. I know there will be a massive showing of Green, and am always down for some riding with my pals.

Man Train...

2011-10-16T19:15:00.001-07:00

Don't let the title get you too excited (especially you Casey F. Ryback). Rather, imagine my trusty Single Speed with an Adams Trail-a-bike attached behind and then a Burley trailer attached to the back of that. Yep, a three person rig all powered by me, hauling myself and two little pirates on an adventure.

This weekend I took my two boys to the Double Ogg Dare Festival at Shawnee Mission Park to check out the place and support the park and it's endeavours to turn what was once a horse farm into a huge outdoor experience for the local city dwellers. We had a great time peddling up Ogg road, one of the most bad ass climbs in KC, then on to some gravel and grass shredding. The Original Pirate showed up on her trusty Surly Instigator to rally with the family and we chowed on some nice grilled food and beer, went on a hayride tour of the land and listened to some live bluegrass music. Can't say it could have been much better.

But as it goes it did in fact get better as I met Farmer at BuRP for great ride of everything North of Blue & Blue. I had a good time trying to keep a good pace and an even better time watching Farmer crash-his-brains out on the hard technical sections that make BuRP so rad. I guess he did not really crash that hard, just glad it wasn't me.

Two rides in one day plus beer, food, family and friends. I'd say it was one helluva good Saturday.

Long, Hard and Wet...

2011-10-12T21:40:00.001-07:00

Another P-ride in the books. Man, this day has been freakin' long. I'm so glad to NOT be at work and to finally be minutes from falling asleep in a comfy bed. Had a good turnout tonight of eleven brave souls (The Manimal, Pyro, Coletrain, Cliff, Farmer, Gabriel, Hector, Billy, Taylor, F.M. and a mystery dude). We We lost two riders (by choice) due to multiple flats or low tire issues. My lack of ability to keep track of time is starting to show. The P-ride is supposed to be 1.5-2 hours of fun. Lately we've been out for 2.5 hours on average, and tonight was no different.

We clocked in some 20+ miles of solid trail at a good pace. I thought I was dragging-ass the whole night but Pyro claimed we were rolling pretty good. That's all I needed to hear to feel o.k. with the ride. I had to work late, participate in a happy hour and miss dinner, and barely made it home in time to ride. I was going to sum up the ride for me as a total shit circus, as my pre-ride nutrition consisted of three Porters and a Manhattan (on an empty stomach), but all was good in the end.

Speaking of the end...three lights went dead - we were out riding that long. It started raining cats and dogs the last ten minutes of the ride and we had really got soaked, but all was good and we enjoyed the cool down. Damn, If I was'nt half asleep I'd come up with something better to say than yeehaw and right-on...good times.

The rain did in fact kill our typical campfire routine, but we managed to toss back a few cold ones in the Man Cave and talk some trash. The mile of new single track we rode tonight was great, a welcome addition to any epic ride - and we strive for epic. Thanks to Chipotle for sponsoring the ride with some BYGO cards. Wishing I had tossed back a burrito the size of my face before the ride. No solid food prior to a long, hard and wet ride really make you feel like a turd.
Hope to see you next week...Cheers!

Own a Piece of Pirate History...

2011-10-12T08:48:00.000-07:00

SOLD

Vicious Cycles - Monolith Frame

Single Speed with E.B.B.
Large Frame (19.5" C/C)
Custom Reynolds 853 Steel, super light and compliant
Team Paint
Sterling Silver Head badge
Bottle Opener on Left Chain stay
Disc Only
26" wheels, 27.2 post and 1 1/8" steerer required

This was going to be my daily driver until I realized that I bought this beauty a bit too tall for me. Vicious builds custom frames and are totally bad ass. I put maybe 50 miles on this frame. There are a few chips in the paint (that's because I rode it). E.B.B works awesome! Seriously light weight, excellent condition. More info at Vicious Cycles. Retail on this beast is $1,400.00. Also have this on ebay HERE.

Asking ~~$500~~ $450 OBO

SOLD

Surly - Karate Monkey 29er Frame & Fork

Single Speed with Horizontal Dropouts
Chromoly Steel Frame and matching Fork
Disc OR Canti/V-Brake ready
Large (19 1/2" C/C)
Includes Monkey Nuts (so you can run gears)
Includes Surly Constrictor Seat post Clamp
27.2 seat post, 1 1/8" steerer required

The Karate Monkey is bad ass. It can be used as a 29er Mtn Bike, a commuter, monster cross, road bike or whatever you dream. A real pleasure to ride. I used it as a commuter for a time and a MTB for a time. See Surly for more info. Also have this on ebay HERE. Great Condition!

Retail is $475.00. Asking ~~$350~~ $300 OBO

Email me with questions at climbing_guides@hotmail.com

I am willing to ship if you cover the cost.

Helmet Testing...

2011-10-10T15:01:00.000-07:00

Stole this one from Shoffner...

Holy Crap THIS could happen at SMP.

I'm serious.

Have you seen the size of the bucks roaming around there?

What if he thinks you're putting the moves on his ladies?

What if you stole his beer?

At any rate, this is some sweet action footage.

Danny Macaskil would have bunny-hopped...

Remember When...

2011-10-10T11:07:00.000-07:00

Do you recall your most favorite rides of all time? Maybe it was a race, an Urban Assault Mission, a Sweet Jump as a kid on your BMX or just a Great Time riding with your pals.

I was reminded of one of those times over the weekend. Makes an old fella like me feel good to look back on the best times had, and looking forward to many more. A special shout-out to all my close riding pals, you know who you are because your names are plastered all over this blog. We have hella good times in the saddle!

Think back...What were your favorite rides??

Fall Project: Kona Unit...

2011-10-08T23:08:00.000-07:00

I got a little antsy-in-my-pantsy's and started to get my newer Kona Unit built-up and ready to roll. I almost succeeded, but lacked enough brake cable housing to get the rear mechanical disc brake connected. That's not all bad, and if you read THIS you know you don't really need a rear brake anyway.

Still anxious to get out on this beast, and not truly knowing what the hell I was going to do with it, I started dabbling into my parts bin to get something going. My initial thoughts were Monster Cross or Commuter. Now that I have this puppy together and have taken her out for a spin, I am thinking I need a second wheel set - I'm rolling with Street Machine/Back-up Single Speed.

Here is the build for those who are into that sort of thing:

2011 Kona Unit, Size Large Single Speed frame w/ Sliding Drops
Thomson Elite Layback post, silver
Thomson Elite Stem, 110 x 6, Black
Chris King Headset, silver
White Brothers Rock Solid Carbon 29er Fork
WTB Rocket V Team, Ti railed saddle
Kona Clamp
Yeti Lock-on Grips
Real anodized Blue Levers
On One Mary Bar (flipped)
Race Face Forged Turbine cranks
Spot Bash Ring
Surly 34t Chainring
Surly 16t Cog
Sram 8-speed chain
Bontrager Race Lite Wheels w/DT Swiss Hubs
Schwable Big Apple 29 x 2.35 Slicks
Avid BB7 Mechanical Disc Brake(s)
Welgo Flats

The ride is fun, feels great on the pavement and I'll be able to haul around the little Pirates on the Trail-a-bike or Burley Trailer with ease. For now I might remove the rear brake and lever. I don't think I need it, especially once I have The Manimal build-up the Phil Wood hub I have to eventually make this into a fixie. I also have thoughts of putting some skinny knobbies on and trying a few CX races. Hmm...choices.

One thing I will add: The Schwable Big Apples are awesome and fun urban tires, however they suck-balls on loose dirt singletrack...just sayin'.

It's Gonna Rain...

2011-10-07T12:22:00.000-07:00

That's what happens when you get a new bike. Here you see a 2011 version of the same 29er SS I currently ride, the Kona Unit. The geometry on this frame works well for me, I dig it. New drop-outs on this version which I think are an improvement. Of course I had to do custom two-tone paint so I don't look like that one guy with the animal sounding nickname. I'm thinking that this is going to be either my Monster Cross or Urban Machine for the winter. The final decision's going to me made by my box of parts, and what does or does not work. I'm psyched though, to have two of the same geometry frames built up and ready to roll. I'm not so psyched about the rain that always comes after a new bike is purchased, but so it goes...it's dusty as Hell out there and we could use it.

Share the Love...

2011-10-07T12:17:00.000-07:00

If you love to ride, share it with your friends & family. Take them out riding and let them find out for themselves if they love it too. Here we have evidence of a full Family fr Pirates who enjoyed 10 miles of riding, a pit-stop mid-way for a picnic and some playground time. AWESOME ride and time spent with the family! I wouldn't have it any other way!

This was also the last ride for me on the Karate Monkey. I've got a new steed and will get it built-up over the weekend. See you out there!

Fuelish Motivation...

2011-10-06T12:40:00.000-07:00

Another P-ride success story! Things started off tonight with a tight knit crew gearing up as usual, and then a few brave souls slipped off into the Backyard Skills Course for some pre-ride entertainment. Sorry I missed out on that, I do love trying to ride some skinnies!

The Manimal, Nick, Speeding Jesus, Cliff, Billy, Farmer and I turned on the lights and headed out on what I am now dubbing 'The Standard P-Loop'. After many weeks of scouting and riding different trails and variations of each, I believe this weeks loop was in fact the best mix of terrain, rests, hills and kick-you-in-the-vag riding for true P-ride bliss.

The agenda; 'Don't loose anyone' and 'Beer Hill Contest'. The Beer Hill contest happens every ride, however this time we had an award for the best effort on all (4) hills. Per the norm, The Manimal showed some pretty fine attempts. I made it up the short and sweet climb at the lolly-pop hill, and the railroad tie crap-hill. Cliff Was railing some solid attempts and styled at least one of the leg-burners. All-in-all the grand prize was awarded to Farmer, for his successful send of three out of the four, and on the fourth he was out of the hard stuff when he dabbed anyway. Congrats to you Farmer. I hope you and (3) of your pals enjoy your meal at Chipotle, who kindly gave us a handful of free burritos to fuel our endeavors.

The ride itself was great. We all kept a pretty solid pace for all 18 miles of trail. I flatted once, The Manimal helped me plug my tire and we were back up and rolling in no time. He at one point had to stop and deal with a chain that kept popping off, but otherwise a fairly mechanical and crash free ride. Let's back up a second and scratch that crash free part. I think Nick crashed his brains out on at least 2-3 of the rocky creek crossings. I missed seeing those, always a bummer to miss such excitement. Then Billy whacked his foot on a sharp rock which made the last 3 miles uncomfortable, but he didn't whine any. I was pretty much waxed and ready for a beer halfway through the ride but we kept pushing a solid pace, stopping at intersections or major turns for a moment to gather our 7 man crew. Good times for sure. I was also trying to get my fixie log hopping technique dialed-in. There are like *402 log's on this loop, and if you can't ride over a log, you are getting left in the dust (and boy was it dusty!). Somehow major log crashes did not come to fruition, though I was having a helluva time being 100% for the night, not really even close.

Post ride Barley Pops and Campfire is the standard, and some leftover marshmallows and gram crackers care of Jesse from last weeks ride made for a chill ending to the evening's festivities. Special thanks to Ranski for showing up to start the fire and drink beer with us, even though he did not ride. Always a pleasure!

See you all next week, if you dare...

Get Your Fix......

2011-10-05T14:07:00.000-07:00

Take a minute to visit Fixed Gear Gallery sometime.

Sweet little gem of a site that recently featured my Gunnar Fixie.

Enjoy!

Double Up...

2011-10-05T08:19:00.000-07:00

For those of you , like The Manimal, who just can't get enough time in the saddle...

Hit-up the Swayze Memorial Cross show-and-go at Roanoke Park, Wednesday's @ 6 in October, FREE. Good times lead by THIS guy. After you've spun your brains out in the grass for an hour, head on over to the kick-you-in-the-balls P-ride which rolls out @ 8:30 in Shawnee. Only then will you become the person you've always wanted to be.

Stars & Stripes...

2011-10-04T10:11:00.000-07:00

Way to go Bro! Cameron and Daniel Killed it and won the duo 24HR USA Cycling National Championships! I can't say enough about Cam and the quality of guy he really is. His time here in KC riding with the posse and sharing his love and enthusiasm for biking really changed our crew and the scene. As one of the original Ethos Posse, we congratulate or bro on kicking a$$ at 24HR Nationals.

Did we really suspect otherwise...NEVER!

Sunday Schooled...

2011-10-02T22:03:00.000-07:00

What a whirl wind of a week it's been as far as riding bikes and enjoying perfect weather. First it was 2 hours at the Pirate Ride, then 3 hours at Swope. Tonight, to top it all of was a night ride on the trusty SS with none other than The Manimal and Taylor at BuRP. Nine o'clock and we were off and into the winding treasure known as The Wagon Trail. As we twisted and turned through the sweet and rocky terrain we heard strange noises; maybe a pack of man-eating werewolves. It was an eerie sound, and if any one of us were riding alone, it would have been ride over and pants soiled. Since we were a party of three, we knew we could fend off any mystical creature in our path so we trudged on - through the many technical rock sections that are the gem of the Wagon Trail.

In reality the fun just never ends at BuRP. We hit up all the classic goods; Little Moab, Highline, Rocky Top, Wagon, etc. The rock gardens don't get any better or more challenging than this. The lines are improbable and we tried variations time and time again, only to get an occasional spanking on trail that at one time we could ride with general ease. It had been way too long, distracted with all the hype of new trail at Swope and the blindfold of racing. It was a great thing to get a taste of what we had been missing out on this season, one of our old regular rides. We had a blast. Lets do that again...soon.

While You Were Out...

2011-10-01T11:08:00.000-07:00

...racing CX or watching some overblown sports event cast with people you don't know and never will, I was riding my bike in the woods; soul searching. It was a beautiful day, perfect weather and the great outdoors was calling my name. It seems as of late that I've been doing a lot of group rides and not enough solo rides or just me and a few good pals. I needed some kind of reunion with the why and what for of mountain biking. I found it today at Swope.

I went back to basics: grabbed some water, my rigid fixie and headed out for an adventure. No time clocks, no racing, no one else to lead or follow; nothing but me and my free spirit wondering around on buff singletrack beneath the changing leaves of fall. I discovered a few things on my journey. I love the solitude of riding alone. I love the quiet of a bike stripped of all of the ridiculousness that is technology (which truly takes away more than it gives). I love the fresh air on my face and the copper taste of fear when you have a near miss. I love the journey ,though the end has no face, only a feeling of accomplishment and renewal.

I rode all of Swope, alone. I pushed myself on different terrain. I dreamt of nothing more and wanted nothing more. True bliss. A great ride.

Just when I thought my morning couldn't get any better, my mentor, The Trail Asshole called. I knew it was once again game on for more of Swope, this time with a good friend. I rallied, got my shoes and soaking wet shirt back on and headed out for another good lap. The Trail A-hole and I were ripping Woodchuck run like we owned it, then through 8-pins and on to phase three. I never skipped a beat - even though I pedal striked at least 100* times in the rocky terrain. We kept a good pace though I was tired from my earlier venture. We would stop at giant log crossings and rock gardens to try different ways around, through and over them. We had a helluva grand time pushing each other to be better, laughing along the way.

Missing the CX races means so little when you can have a day full of peace in the saddle like I did today. It makes me want to travel again, like I did in my twenties, for months at a time. Exploring the world and its marvels, ahh what an adventure your life can be if you so choose the path. I'll end this rant with some words from one of my favorite artists of the day, Michael Franti, "No matter how life is today, don't let another moment slip away".

Attitude Adjustment...

2011-09-29T17:03:00.001-07:00

It was a big night for the P-ride in many ways Wednesday night. First off, we had a big turnout...almost too big. Second we had some big guns show, which meant the pace was going to be ugly. Third, we had a few mechanical's and a big late start.

I knew things were going to be out-of-the-ordinary when peeps were arriving for the ride a half hour early. First things first peeps; I am never on time and when I say 8:30ish it means be at my place at no earlier than 8:30 to get ready to ride. If you show up early and get all antsy in your pantsy's sorry for you, but I'm not leaving w/o the whole crew. Secondly, don't be late. I'm not gonna leave you, but I am the one who gets the heat for it. Third, this is a group ride. Say it with me..."Group Ride". That means you wait for the group and make sure no one is lost in the woods. With that said, here is what went down during our epic ride.

We had a huge turnout. The P-ride is more typically a half dozen or so close bros having a good night ride. Recently I've been allowing folks to invite friends and I too have opened up the invite to those who are up for some shenanigans. This week there were fifteen people for the ride. I think half of those people showed up around 8 and the rest casually arrived up until the minute we rolled out, at a very late 'almost 9', when we then anxiously headed out for our dirt addiction. I was honored to have a few new peeps show up that were a pleasure to ride with, namely; Farmer, The Trail A$$hole and Taylor. There were a couple fellas from BikeSource as well as Hector who were rookies to the ride, and were a pleasure to meet. Other's who showed there mugs to rally were Sarah, Justin, The Manimal, Coletrain, Cliff, Nick, Pyro, and Gabriel. Aside form the rookies (only because I don't know them) I knew we had a solid crew that could handle the epic ride planned for the darkness.

The loop is about 20ish miles. I'm guessing that the mix of trial is something like 75% singletrack, 15% gravel and 10% random pavement connectors. Most of the singletrack is mid to advanced level trail and keeps you guessing. A solid loop for sure.

About half way through the ride we, at a faster than usual pace (we should pace off the slowest rider, yet we had some peeps gunning it a bit hard) we lost 4 of the 15. After waiting about 5 minutes, The Manimal, Gabriel and I rode back about a mile and did not see hide nor hair of the 4. The Manimal decides to go on a search, and then too either rendezvous on the planned loop or back at the Pirates Lair. Gabriel and I head back to meet the remaining crew, who were very anxious to keep riding. At this point I was getting a bit frustrated and just led-out and did not stop much, only at intersections to make sure folks went the correct way. By now we had done some 13 miles of good trail. We had one flat and I loaned out my only spare tube to keep the crew moving, though only Justin and I stopped to help. We had one light that was not working great and still the group was fairly motivated to keep rolling.

We hit a paved section and let everyone catch-up before diving back into some dirt. This particular section is fast yet can cause some casualties due to a good amount of large tree roots, rocks, random off-shoots and fallen trees. Coletrain took a good over-the-bars fall at some point along the way. It was a fun spill to watch as he used his cat-like reflexes to catch his carbon bike before it crashed into the rocky earth.

I thought the rear of the crew was keeping watch on each other and I'd ask every ten minutes or so if everyone was accounted for. At some point we in fact lost 2 more riders. WTF people? If I am leading the ride I cannot very well babysit the back, and no one was willing to be the sweep who knew the trail, so things were deteriorating into a fairly good case of the shit-circus. I was not even aware that we'd lost these 2 until we were long gone.

I hate it when we loose people on a group ride. I hate it when people don't enjoy the ride. I hate it when I get back to the campfire and some of the group is missing. NOT COOL! When we were riding back up to my casa at the end of the ride we see three cars leaving, the peeps who had been left behind; that felt like total shit to me. Maybe some of you did not give a rats ass but I was not too psyched about it. It was almost like the walk of shame; for them or for me, either way...not how the P-ride is meant to be, no way.

So all in all, those who finished the ride had a good, long, epic ride. For those who got lost in the woods; I am terribly sorry. That was not cool on my part. That was not cool on any one's part. It was lame and I hope it doesn't detour you from coming again.

I asked the groups opinion about what the ride should be all about and what we needed to do to make it better. I had mixed responses. One thought was to be dick's and make the ride harder, faster and a bit more crazy. If we did that, only a few would come and ride. I've decided against that train of thought. We will NOT be leaving anyone behind. The pace will be notched back to accommodate everyone who rides. The campfire will be surrounded by ALL of the group! The P-ride will continue and get better - it's no weenie roast, nor is it an elitist, leg shaven, sprint of a training ride...

So, a success for some and a failure on my part for others. I guess life is all about living and learning...and I am sometimes a slow learner.

Until next week...Cheers!

Note: Please come prepared for this ride. It is not easy to bail out mid-ride unless you know the area well. Bring the gear you need to fix your bike if it breaks. I am tired of giving out tubes! Make sure your gear is working before you are sitting in front of my house, making other's have to loan you crap or wait on you. Just be prepared, use common sense and know that this is NOT a walk in the park, but an adventure ride that can be hard on you and your gear. Be ready for two hours of pain, fun and socializing around the fire.

Screw Racing, Let's Ride...

2011-09-24T16:33:00.000-07:00

So R.I.M. was cancelled. I vented and all is said and done. Now to make it all better, The Manimal, Old Man Winters and I made plans to head out to Crowder on what would have been race day and ride the trails anyway. We knew the course was trimmed and prepped for the race, the weather was bomber and Doug Long had invited everyone up to camp and drink some Tallgrass Beer race or no race. We could not make the time to camp, but we sure the hell wouldn't miss out on killer trail and free beers, so we loaded up the Greasecar and headed North.

Upon arrival we met up with Little Kevin and Justin. None of us knew the trail system so we winged it and rode the three main loops. We had only done about six miles of trail an knew there had to be more. We doubled back to camp and Doug hooked us up with some additional beta, followed by "if you like epic rides...", so we now had a plan, a solid kick-ass plan.

The first six or so miles of groomed trail were great. The climbing was as hard as it gets here in the Midwest and half of our crew could not make most of the long, rocky climbs. The descents were good until you hit the hard packed corners which were covered in acorns (ie: ball bearings!) and would keep your sphincter puckered tight. Once we finally made it out on our epic second half of the day ride, we were warmed up and psyched for an adventure.

We dropped into the Thompson South Loop and then onto the North loop. Both were indeed epic, with trees down, un-groomed trail and horse prints making for some grueling maneuvers at times. We rode over dozens of logs, along a beautiful river and back up through some fields back to camp. We had a hella good time riding unfamiliar trail for around 3 hours and just shy of twenty miles. My legs were cooked. After a brief hello to a few other KC folks and a quick visit to the cooler for some tasty beverages, we made the 90 minute drive back to KC. I have to say that this was one of the funner rides I've done as of late. Great crew of guys having fun riding bikes. No time clock, no awards, no loser's....all winners. Cheers!

Snake Charmer...

2011-09-22T10:20:00.000-07:00

It was business as usual on a Wednesday Night at the Pirates Lair. The nightly routine went as planned and 8:30 was closing in fast. I walked outside to check the weather, as it was looking like we might get spit on minutes earlier, but all was good. Temps were I'm guessing in the high 50's and the ground was bone dry. Perfect night for a ride!

Peeps started arriving one by one until there were a solid pack of ten ready to roll out on a night adventure in the woods. A train of ten headlamps zooming through the woods is a sight to see, especially on switchbacks with the group spread out a bit; it was just cool to see folks above and below you illuminated by a small white glow. The guest list included the usual suspects; The Kid, The Manimal, Pyro, Sarah, Cliff and rookies Kevin, Gabriel, Justin and Nick.

We added a short section of new single track to our ride tonight, deleted other sections and made a brief stop about an hour and a half into the ride so our ten could become 9. From there we were cruising at what I am guessing was mileage in the mid teens when I got a good 1/4" tear in my front tire. I tried to plug it but the tear was far too big, even for two plugs. Of course I was not practising what I preach and was running a crappy Conti Mountain King instead of my trusted Specialized Captain Grid. My bad! I had to install my first tube in at least two seasons of riding, bummer! Shortly after installing the tube I was trying to catch up with the front of the group when I was suddenly attacked by a rare and vicious beast, known here in the Midwest as the 'Black Boa'.

Fortunately Gabriel and Justin helped me pit-crew style and we had this very tube reinstalled and holding air in minutes and were back riding.

Beer Hill(s) tonight were a bust. Not a single one of our crew made any of said climbs. We did however manage to stick together, have fun and maintain what I would consider a pretty darn solid pace. I was riding the rigid Fixie, and not too well, but managed to keep up...or at least did not get left in the woods.

Some notes on the ride: there are a shit-ton of logs you must hop, a fair amount of climbing and loads of rock to keep you on your game. Yes, at some times we hit some gravel or pavement between sections of dirt, but for the most part the loop is no weeny roast and keeps you guessing.

Per the standard post ride protocol, the crew gathered around the campfire and/or dipped in the hot tub while sipping suds and telling fishing stories until we realized it was getting way to late to be out on a school night. Good times. Thanks for showing up and I hope to see you jerks next week!

Urban Jungle...

2011-09-21T08:25:00.000-07:00

It's Wednesday. It's gonna be one helluva a good ride tonight. I'm super psyched and the crew is in for some treats. Beer Hill x3, need I say more?

Rapture Cancelled...

2011-09-19T12:04:00.000-07:00

Major Bummer on all fronts! This was THE race I had been looking forward to all season long; R.I.M. 6/12 hour kick-in-the-balls endurance race at Crowder. You have to admit; being in the saddle on hard single track for 12 hours at a race pace is true man-style and what it's all about. How long can you suffer and can you actually do it?

I had skipped the SAC River 3/6 in order to juggle my schedule to do R.I.M.. I had done the same for Burning at the Bluff. It was all in for R.I.M.. and now I just have to sit here and cry about what a killer race we are all going to miss, and for what? Is it because far too many of you wimp-ass-chumps complained about no local races in years past only to be a NO SHOW at most of this year’s events? Was it all of the ultra-gay CX jerks who started the season early this year, like they can’t ride at the park anytime of year? Why the F#&K would you rather ride in circles on grass between two pieces of tape for an hour when you could be riding dirt surrounded by nothing but nature for 12? I'm not pissed at the promoters, they are stand up guys. I am friggin’ pissed as a pit-bull in a cage-fight when I say that IF this race was cancelled due to CX season OR because of you no-show mo-fo's, I'm gonna cut your toes off one by one, then hang you off the plank with those nubs dangling in saltwater, till your day ends deep in Davey Jones Locker as shark food.

I suppose my anti-cx race idea may in fact have to come to fruition this winter...if you dicks can handle what the ol' Pirate has brewing when XC meets CX on the battlefield. Something a little more brutal and more dirt than this kick-a$$ video demonstrates...

And to further rag on about random B.S. in the works, or not...I will have to do a few of those CX races this season in true Pirate form to make some things happen on the black market side of things. Watch out you circle-jerks, Here comes one pissed off Irishman with full body hair ready to get dirty...back alley style.

See you out there.

Jet Lag Night Ride...

2011-09-16T07:00:00.001-07:00

It was a long strange trip out to the West Coast to do some work. As you see in the photos below…I had a good time when not working by sampling as many local beers as possible, visiting the beach and relaxing. I had flown out to L.A. on 9-11, a great test of fear control and patients. The local media and law enforcement were having their hay day and I was business as usual. The flight back made a stop in Denver, then on home to KC., just in time to get my kiddos to bed and suit-up for a much needed spin around the local trails with Cliff and Coletrain. Temps were totally kick-ass perfect for riding. Though the usual suspects claimed their individual excuses why they did not show for the ride, these two jerks found the time and we made the best of it.

For some reason at least once a year I clock-the-shit out of my left knee with a direct hit to the ass-end of my stem. With this knee already jacked, I was hurting for the last few miles of our ride…and still today. I’m sure there is at a minimum a pea sized floating piece of bone just grinding away flesh hidden just under the skin. I need to have this looked at before it ruins my biking ability. I also have a non-working rear brake issue that I should probably address before I eat another tree…or I should just stick to the fixie for the rest of the year. Hydrolic brakes are great until you get an air bubble in there, then it’s a crap shoot as to when things are going to work…or not.

Fourteen miles of solid single track in the dark, followed by what else but beers and a warm campfire that nearly melted my leg hair off to match the silky smooth variations of others. Good times for sure. Assuming the trails are dry I am looking forward to a large crew this week, see you then!

Cali Trip in Photos (2)...

2011-09-16T06:58:00.000-07:00

Cali trip in photos (1)...

2011-09-16T06:57:00.000-07:00

Rain Dodging...

2011-09-11T06:54:00.000-07:00

Nothing quite like a good ride at Landahl. One of the best trails around KC for sure. Lots of fun technical features, mine now being the newer technical offshoots on the Family trail. The rock gardens and ribs of limestone that you have to ride up, on, over and down are endless and exciting; especially when the rock is wet and things are scary. The Manimal was testing his metal on the fixie and doing a fine job. Old Man Winters was humoring us with his laid back style and random comic relief. At some point during our 2.5 hour ride, we ran into The Kid who was out for a long training ride. Lucky for him he ran into us to show him how it's done old man style. Go ride Landahl...

Skid Row...

2011-09-08T11:05:00.000-07:00

Shiver me timbers! Last nights ride was a huge success. We had the usual crew; The Manimal, The Kid, Pyro and me. Also joining us to test her sea legs was Sarah, who just so happens to be the only women in the KC Metro with enough huevos to ride with us, little lone keep up. Our 8:30ish start pushed to 9:00 and it was starting to get darn right chilly out. A few of the crew dawned arm warmers and vests, which were quickly stowed during the first mile of our ride. We have a pretty good 2 hours loop dialed-in and we busted it out in prime fashion. The Kid, in standard 'The Kid' fashion, crashed his brains out at least a few times. I wasn't short on antics or evasive maneuvers either - falling over or crashing repeatedly in random and stupid locations. I remember doing a climb up a steep bench cut and hearing a crash behind me. I glanced back to see the damage only to fall down the hill and into a tree like an idiot. It was The Kid going over the bars behind me and doing the running man for a solid 30' that caused the initial racket. Unscathed we pushed on. I do recall Sarah taking a good spill and maybe even the Manimal. Heck, even Pyro went down. It was anarchy on bikes, skid row madness and dirt hugging good times. Our loop now incorporates plenty of spinning, technical rock gardens, dozens of logs and some long, leg-burning climbs. We plundered the full Pirate Loop, and other than the lack of trimming on our rogue journey, it was a killer-good time.

Temps fell to the fifties and we all hopped into the tub for post ride muscle relaxation and barley-pop drinking. After turning into pumpkins the crew called it a night (shortly after The Kid Poofed) sans fire and headed to their respected homes. Fall is coming...then winter. It's all good on Wednesday nights!

Post Ride Rewards...

2011-09-07T12:28:00.000-07:00

Ahoy there landlubbers! Things are looking better than excellent for tonight's Pirate Ride. Hope you shenanigan loving fools can make it.

Lets see...

Beer
Single Track
Bikes
Campfire
Hot Tub
Cool Temps

Yep, all things check! Psyched!

The Bike Closet...

2011-09-06T11:59:00.001-07:00

My garage...Oh how it was a freakin' disaster zone. I had things with wheels all over the godforsaken place. I needed a storage solution; something that was freestanding, mobile and not hanging from the ceiling. I asked the locals for a solution, and had some good feedback. Then I hit up old Craigslist and this baby just happened to be available. After a bit of playing around and modification, here she is is her current state of pure awesomeness - The Bike Closet. Kinda makes me feel like I'm dating the entire Swedish Bikini Team for some reason.

Night Train...

2011-08-31T21:52:00.000-07:00

We were teased by the weather gods with mild temps over the weekend, and plans for the Pirate Night ride were sounding better by the minute. That was until the minutes turned to days and the days became hotter than fresh shit. I don't know what the temp was when our train pulled out, but it felt like we were riding into an elephant sized hair dryer and the humidity had to be at 102%. Nonetheless we were determined to have a kick-ass time riding bikes in the darkness, and the clan of Ethos jerks who showed-up to ride was a good crew to make crazyness happen.

The Manimal and I had scoped out some new trail and had an actual plan of what our loop would be, and it was a good loop. We mixed it up a bit with some paved trail for recovery, gravel double track and miles of dusty single track.

The Bald Chimp was sporting a sweet rock climbing helmet and headlamp, always just ahead of the trend. Coletrain was there to experience the event as well as Pyro and the usual suspects; The Kid and The Manimal. We had zero mechanicals and our lights burned bright for two hours, just shy of 20 miles and around 900 ft of elevation gain.
It had to be in the first fifteen minutes of the ride that Coletrain biffed some evasive maneuver and tweaked his knee, only to push on an hour further until he DNF'd. I was the only other to eat-dirt during our ride and that was due to being plain worn-out from chasing the big guns on my fixed gear (and afterk a pre-ride beer). I was hurting but that's sometimes just part of the game.

A good ridewas had with some stand-up fellas, followed by some lounging in the backyard - sipping barley-pops under the stars. Lets do it again next week!

Tall Oaks Challenge...

2011-08-28T10:28:00.001-07:00

I’d had a crazy week that was more than filling up what limited time I don’t have. The Manimal and I had ripped-it-up during our weekly night ride and I was feeling pretty good in the cycling scheme-of things and he talked me into NOT cleaning out my garage, but instead driving three hours southeast to Binder Lake for the Tall Oaks Challenge 6hr race. I do love endurance racing, so the twisting of my arm was short lived and I was good to go. I feel like, in the overall bike racing scene, that endurance races are the real deal. This is where hard dirt single track riding meets not only fitness but mental will power. If you are a bad ass at endurance racing, you are a bad ass all around in my book. Just because you can ride fast and win some XC or CX races does not make you a man in my book. It’s the long haul or chopped balls as far as I see it, and the Ethos posse saved face and threw down on Sunday. All you shit talkers can eat my shorts!

The Tank Posing

As it goes The Manimal, Pyro and our pit boss Double D all headed out at 6 a.m. in the Vdub, luxury style. We arrived, set up a nice pit area right on the course, and readied our rigs and minds for the fun 6 hours on what turned out to be a crazy fast single track system. We were all kitted-up, had nutrition laid-out and ready for a quick hand-off and lined-up for the mass shotgun start.

The Course = Stellar!

JP was first into the woods, killing it. Travis was not far behind and I was in my typical mid pack position. Considering the train of riders, peeps were pushing hard and there was no real congestion on the trail. At about mile 1.2 we hit a loose and fast downhill section. This is where the race changed for me. Just two places ahead of me a rider crashed hard into a tree. I guess my past working Search and Rescue, being an EMT and understanding the value of time if hurt in the backcountry made me stop to check the situation and see if things were o.k.. As I arrived a women was curled-up sitting and rocking, guarded and moaning in pain. Her helmet was cocked-back and I could tell things could possibly be bad. She had hit HARD! After a minute or so she finally was able to tell me her name and I did a quick and dirty assessment of her condition. I felt she could possibly have a concussion and broken arm, so I asked a few riders to spread the word to get help and I stayed with her to see if she would come out of the almost shock-like condition. Thankfully she did and after some words I felt she was o.k. to walk out. I helped Mia and her bike off the course, leaving mine in the woods; I planned to return once she was in better hands and finish my race. We made it back to the pit area, I handed her off and proceeded back to my bike.

Mia and I after the race

Now for more trouble. I decided to start cutting switchbacks as I ran back to my bike. This was a jackass maneuver and I found myself lost in the woods. I could not find my bike and the trail did not look familiar. Finally I heard some riders and was running down the trail just as The Kid and The Manimal whizzed by on their second lap. At this point I knew I was out of the race. There was no way I’d make up a lap +, so I decided at that point to hop on my rig and do some blocking for the team.

I rallied it hard on that first lap, red-lined the whole way trying to stay in front of the 4th position rider and see if I could scrub even a few seconds off his time when he caught me and wanted to pass. I was no jackass, I just wanted to see if I could push the pace and also help out my team. I arrived back at the pit area where I dismounted for a break, knowing that I was now riding just for the fun of it. I stepped next door and checked on Mia, and she was doing WAY better, which was a huge relief. NO race is worth someone being left injured in the woods, and I was more than happy to help her out with no feeling of anything owed to me in return. I was having a hella-fun day!

The Kid riding into the finish - last lap

For my second lap I thought I’d push it to see what kind of lap times I might have averaged if I were still in it for the money. Karma lap two began as I ran upon Gino pulling pit-crew for some fella who busted his chain. Me being all helpful-like overheard the need for a quicklink and stopped to oblige. There went my lap time once again. The course however was ripping, and I did manage to pull of some sweet moves, and during said lap hit a sweet log skinny on the right side of the trail with the skills of a squirrel on a wire. I also proceeded each lap to catch major air on the two dirt jumps out on the grass,,, if you raced you know the ones. Too bad the photographer gal was not standing close enough to catch my X games-like stunts on film; only then would you know how bad-ass I truly am.

The Pirates Lair

Back at the pit I get this idea that it’s beer-thirty. I also decide that it would be a good idea to let Peat Awesome bunny-hop me as he plowed through the pit area. Unfortunately Peat is so awesomely fast on that old POS bike that all I could catch was this sweet wheelie, which he could have ridden to the booby barn and back no problem.

Peat Awesome showing his Superior Awesomeness

Finally I did toss back another lap as well as three Boulevard Singlewide IPA’s, which was just enough carbo-loading to send me out on a last lap chasing The Manimal and Coletrain for a burning 39ish minute lap that truly felt like the best of the day.

The Kid in GO mode

The team killed it as usual today; The Kid and Pyro wining the duo, JP and The Manimal pulling in a tight 6th, Sarah and FM somewhere closer to first than last, Coletrain with a 5th in the solo (on a SS), Kay with 1st and K-Rocket with 3rd in the solo, JDoug and Craig I'm sure did a swell job too, but my memory fails me as to what level of kick-ass they performed. For myself, I succeeded in pulling of my standard goal of ‘Finish, not last’, which is a wonder since I was for the most part hanging at the pit area drinking barley pops (thanks FM!) and eating team Rocket's Ginger Snaps. The three hours back to KC went well post Mexican food and Margs. Hope to see you punks at Casa De Burnsey for the Wednesday Night Ride!

JP explaining the nutritional value of Ginger Snaps

The Manimal after his hippy shower in Binder Lake

Coletrain got his spine back - 6 hr SS

Feeling a little Surly...

2011-08-25T22:24:00.000-07:00

Awe Yeah, another fine night ride in the books. The Manimal and I took a tour of some undisclosed trail where we did in fact meet some rock obstacles, some nice dirt and 3,624* giant spider webs. I think we may have ridden until dawn but as Casey F. Ryback would say, The Manimals light got it's wrist snapped at 2.5 hours into our ride, so we cut it short only to find ourselves slightly less chilly than the barley pops we ingested. Temps tonight are perfectly cool.

Rolling the anti-freewheel machines once again we had a great time. I have to add that what in years past would have been referred to as the super heavy, unresponsive tank-of-a-1x1 fork, is now a well built stroke of 100mm corrected Surly genius. The 2011 version is way better. I do like it, even better than the Pace carbon I was running prior. Nice work Surly. I'll drink another one to that.

Weekend Madness...

2011-08-21T18:50:00.000-07:00

Twas a grand weekend here at the Pirate Lair. We started off the weekend with my little big man learning a lesson about bringing a weapon to a fight, and how that weapon can always be acquired by the enemy and used against you. Here we have my vicious guard dog who was being chased with a baseball bat around the house. Two minutes later my little big man was running around the corner screaming and the mutt was close behind...armed and ready for revenge.

Then it was off to Smithville Lake to pay tribute to the local trail building not-for-profit ERTA. We met a whole posse of trail users, ate some incredible food (free), drank some Beer (free), Donated some gear to be raffled off to benefit the trails, went on a family bike ride with my wife and kids (me and little big man hooked together; me on the Monkey and he on his new trail-a-bike (which is awesome!) and Mrs. Pirate hauling the Burley trailer with big little man). It was a great night to be outside, cool and with a view of the sun setting over the lake. Granny & Gramps Pirate were there too, and Granny P won some sweet gear from none other than Chamois Butt'r. Of course I did not tell her what the product was used for until after I snapped this sweet photo.

Today I did another good Family ride on the paved trail, pulling kids and having fun. If you need a little bit of training Pirate style, drag your 35# kid around on a 30# trail-a-bike for an hour and a half a single speed geared way to tall for climbing hills with a load. That will teach you something that those skinny tires and tights won't. Heck, go old school and try the same load up Ogg Road and see what kills you... You'll learn really quick that it's better to burn-out than to fade, and those endurance races just got one step easier.

Spiderfest 2011...

2011-08-20T09:40:00.001-07:00

Tall Gra$$ and Haulin A$$...

2011-08-18T09:20:00.000-07:00

To all you sucka-pants that didn't show up - you missed out on a hella good ride. Five brave souls took to the woods from the Pirates Lair last night for the second of many-to-come Pirate Night Rides. We hit-up all kinds of trail; hero dirt, overgrown jungle, gravel double-track and of course a handful of secret shizzle that I can't even begin to write about here.

The Bald Chimp and The Kid showed for the ride after doing the sit-n-spin roadie ride, so they were warmed up and ready for the real deal. Tampons were removed and balls dropped back into true position.

I'll say the ride was a great success. We had zero mechanicals and all of us had a good time. All but Flatman (who since being dubbed said nickname has upgraded to Specialized Grid tires, tubeless set-up and has had ZERO flats) were riding one gear. The Manimal and I spiced it up a bit and rode our fixed steeds, which turned out to make for even more fun than could possibly be imagined. I had not been on a 26" wheeled bike in months and my Gunnar made me feel like a kid at the pump track. The Bald Chimp was riding my 29er SS, which I call The Tank, and did at some point manage to grab a stick with my rear wheel and knock that sucker right out of true; but she's a tank after all, and TBC kept her rolling.

It was good to have the crew (most of them anyway), as all these fellas are my racing pals from Ethos, show up and have a good time. THIS is what makes a team great, more so than podiums, training hard, fancy bikes or fame & glory - but rather getting out and having a good time with friends that you know and love.

For those of you who missed out...there's always next week. If you do show up next week, please double check that all of your gear is working before you drive out to B.F.E. only to get shut down by some issues, like a non-working light for example. We will only feel sorry for you for the 30 seconds it takes for the crew to leave you with your pants down as we ride out of site...

Weekly Pirate Ride...

2011-08-17T07:49:00.000-07:00

I'm a busy man. I can't seem to figure out a way to get in enough time on my bike so I am officially brewing up my weekly group night ride. Usually this event is a winter activity but times they are a changing. 1 1/2 - 2 hour ride, pace depends on who shows-up.

This is an invitation only for like minded folks who are cool with the shenanigans related to a typical ride with the Pirate. If you are offended by sex, drugs, rock & roll, hookers, poaching, trespassing, booze or having a crazy good time - don't bother showing your ugly mug at this ride. This is a self supported ride - bring the tools/parts/tubes/air to fix anything that might break. The group is not going to hold your hand when your 10 miles from nowhere with a flat or broken chain and don't have the goods to fix it. We'll help you pit crew style...if you have the stuff to deal. If you are a tool instead of bringing one...see ya. Make sure your light is good to go, battery charged and bring a back-up!

Post ride b.y.o.b. at the Pirates Lair. Once the weather turns cooler we'll do a fire and/or hot tub'n. Optional backyard skills course runs are always welcome. SS or Fixed gear a plus but if all you have is one of those geared tanks, we'll still have you.

Get in touch with me if your game. Check the Weekly Pirate Ride header at the top right of the main page for current date, time and location.

Note: 9/10/11

So far so good. We've had a handful of folks ride each week and the typical agenda is; show up at 7:45, gear-up and we roll around 8:00 sharp. Average 2 hours / 15 mils ride +/-, each week taking a different route on varied terrain (be prepared for anything). The campfire is feeling great with the cool temps, and the Hot tub has seen it's fair share of sore muscles post ride. The crew's been dispersing around midnight in case you want to know when to tell your momma you'll be home. Though 'The Kid' can't seem to figure out what BYOB means, the barley pops have been a flowing and good times had. Chipotle is our weekely ride sponsor so be prepared for antic-awarded burrito possibilities.
Don't die wondering...Show up and get your bike dirty.

Fear is an Illusion...

2011-08-16T14:55:00.000-07:00

Who did you want to be when you grew-up? Remember?

Danny Boy remembers...

The Dope on Swope - Spoke Pony 3/6...

2011-08-13T16:23:00.001-07:00

The much awaited, feared, loathed and loved endurance event 'Spoke Pony Showdown 3/6' did in fact go down as scheduled at the bad-to-the-bone trail system simply dubbed 'Swope'. Friday the trails were blasted with multiple thunderstorms, yet the course was ready to go race time Saturday morning. Those who dared to test his physical and mental strength showed face to rally and experience a sick course. The Trail Hermits spare no expense putting on the show, and they'd staged the trail with points of entertainment to keep you smiling from ear to ear throughout the entire event.

Dead Hooker and The one and only Trail Asshole

My plan was to show up, chill with my pals and ride bikes for six hours. I really enjoy being in the forest, albeit in the heart of a large city and still feel like your miles away. This trail system is indeed a gift to KC, and a favorite of mine for sure. I can't say that a bad time could be had, unless you just let a mechanical or a run of bad luck eat at you. I was in it for a good time, nothing more, and damned if anything was gonna change that.

All the usual Ethos suspects were there, you know the ones. The Manimal and I were going to battle it out in the 6hr Single Speed Open. Travis and Garet leading the fast train, Kevin rallying his usual carefree race ethic, JDoug pushing his technical comfort level on the slick rocks and Sarah throwing down in her usual bad ass style. We also met up with a few pals; Peat Awesome was there. Good ol' Peat will keep you smiling with his daredevil skills and topping off his typical shenanigans - he raced some real p.o.s. bike from the 90's that most folks would use as a boat anchor. As they say and as was proved ...it's not the bike, it's the person on it. We also met up with a few of the Team Seagal Jerk's, who were so kind as to give the one finger salute each lap and provide some tasty PBR's for post race rehydration. These fellas are all stand-up guys who seem to be on the same page as the Pirate - Just out for a furry good time!

Thugs

The mass start lined up for a climb to separate the 'contenders from the pretenders'. I rolled into the single track in a good spot and did not really have to wait in any kind of heinous train of slow jackass riders like times past. I enjoyed watching crash after crash on the slick rocks and bike shifting tree roots. The dirt was great but the rocks...deadly.

My legs were feeling bombproof, my style and grace impeccable, my body temp however was rising and I was feeling like a prom queen the morning after; worn down and just plain confused about why my body felt weird. Each lap I'd stop a little longer at the pit area to run cold water over my core, rest and get my head on straight. I killed major time but as usual had toat the very least finish the race. At this point that was my goal and I was no longer worried about the time.

The course was, simply put, awesome. THE best course I've been on, ever. If you missed this race, you are going to die wondering. Heartland always kicks it up a notch and this was no exception.

After rolling into the gate with time for a last lap, I decided to accept a beer hand up from Shoffner and call it a day. I knew I had 3rd in the bag and saved my juice to ride another day.

A couple notes: there were two forms of good luck for my race. 1) My number plate was significant. 2) As I was prepping to race a sweet Vdub bus pulled up and made me smile. I knew it would be a good day! To top it all off my Wife and two boys showed-up to see me standing on the podium which really made for a perfect day.

The Seagal Salute

Ethos finished up pretty well, with the following podiums;

Burnsey 3rd 6 hr SS

Manimal 1st 6hr SS

Sarah 1st

Jason 5th

Travis 1st

Special Thanks to the volunteers and the Trail Hermits for putting on an amazing event! Mad Props to the Manimal for pushing himself hard and cranking out 8 laps on one gear...your a bad ass! Travis killed it with 9 laps, unheard of on trails this sick. Congrats fellas!

SS Podium

A Good Spin...

2011-08-12T06:48:00.001-07:00

It's been hot as hell here in the Midwest for most of the summer; blistering death! Riding bikes around here as of late could be easily compares to riding in a wind tunnel turned up to hairdryer temps and just cooking your innards along the way. Last night The Manimal and I kicked back up the Thursday Night Ride.

It's that time of year - Spiders (this one the size of a golf ball) are out in full force, their webs spanning the trail seemingly always at face height.

This is the same old ride we do all winter but we spice it up and change the course each time out. Last night was no different. We headed out from Pirate headquarters at the stroke of 9ish. The wind was feeling cool and we were psyched to lubricate our legs in preparation for the Spoke Pony Showdown 6 hours of torture we are to endure on Saturday at Swope.

We set a casual pace, one that might make you think we had whiskey in our water bottles, yet moving good enough to elude the mysterious mountain lion (our imaginary friend that summons the fear and adrenaline required to really sprint when needed). We hit some sweet rogue trail, and every time we ride this particular stretch we think 'man, I love this trail'. We hit some overgrown deer trail that had a bunch of fallen trees that we nimbly maneuver over like cats. We hit some gravel double track for just long enough to prep for the steep ass climb that neither of us successfully rode. We hit-up miles of dusty single track; mostly flowing but often broken-up by a rock garden or improbable switchback. We rally back to the pirates lair and push hard up the Lawrence hill - always a nice yet feared end to a great ride.

To beat the heat, Thursday Night Rides are officially back in season. As the snow comes we will be switching over to fixed-gear mountain bikes and following rides with hot tubbin' and campfire action, and of course a few Barley Pops tossed in for good measure.

Par-T-time...

2011-08-11T08:30:00.001-07:00

Riding bikes to me is all about fun. If it's not fun than I'm not gonna do it, nope. I just picked up this little Specialised Fuse and am dubbing her 'coffee', as I will be hitting the bike park on my to work in the mornings to relive the fun I had as a kid; jumping and crashing my brains out till I puke or just am awake. That should set me straight for the rest of the day, every day. Yeehaw!

six @ swope...

2011-08-09T14:45:00.000-07:00

Course Map

Spoke Pony Showdown 3/6 - Big time endurance mountain bike race this weekend here in Kansas City. The temps have dropped and it's time to take a ride on the pain train. Opt for three or six hours of single track bliss, full of all that you can (or can't) handle. Swope is the king of kings around here; dialed trail that works you like a minimum wage job. Don't even bother coming out to race without a few extra tampons in your jersey pockets you roadie jerks, this is the real deal. I'll be there for the long haul, loving every grueling minute. You better be there too; unless you're a tool. See you Saturday for dirt loving good times.

Fourteen Hours West...

2011-08-02T08:18:00.000-07:00

Say it with me...ROAD TRIP!

Full report coming very soon...

Tell-u-RIDE...

2011-07-26T14:14:00.000-07:00

Good times in Telluride last week. As sson as I get through playing catch-up with city life, I'll write something about it. Until then, close your eyes and pretend you just rode fiftteen miles in the rockies and had a helluva great time.

Mayhem Inferno...

2011-07-17T18:52:00.000-07:00

Can’t stand the heat, Get out and stop bitchen. Shawnee Mission Mayhem happened. The course was sweet and the temps were off the chart.

My morning started out with packing up the Burley trailer with a cooler full of ice cold water, beer and my riding gear. I live about a mile from the race venue so I thought it only appropriate to ride as opposed to drive. The real kicker to this idea however is the Ogg Road hill coming up from Midland. This is one bad-a$$ hill; the kind that separates the Men from the Manimals. It’s a long climb that gets steeper as you go, and at just when you think it’s over you turn a bend only to see it steepen for another 100 yards. If you want to get strong, do hill intervals here. If you want to blow-up, ride your single speed pulling a trailer full of beer and water.

I arrived with enough time to get suited up and give Beej a high five for completing his first mountain bike race (which had just finished moments earlier). It's funny how ‘off the couch Beej’ can do these things, especially after only riding his ‘90s model single-speed-converted Kona only once on trails this year, which was to pre-ride the race course with yours truly the day before. Nice work buddy!

Now it’s go time. I lined up with the posse and off we went. Down a gravel double track for ¼ mile in the blistering sun and then we’d drop into the single track. Before the race I had figured I’d be the last guy into the woods. I am still running a retard easy gear from my last trip to Colorado, though I tried to get my freewheel changed before the race, but failed to get it to budge. Spinning my brains out on the gravel was not going to be worth it and I knew I could make up the time on the technical sections of the trail. I did indeed succeed in being the last guy into the woods but began my subtle attack and had passed 8 riders by the time we hit the 4-way mid lap. My boy the trail asshole would be proud to know that one pass occurred when I hopped a large fallen tree as the other rider went around, and two riders I passed at each of the (2) hard left switchbacks while they could not make the turn w/o dabbing. Towards the end of lap one you bust out onto the power line cut and into the heat surrounded by 4’ tall grass; it was like riding into a hair dryer. Just plain nasty and sucked the life right out of you for the final ¼ mile to the start/finish. As I started lap 2 my man Beej did a perfect bottle hand-up and I was rolling once again on the gravel double track. Here I used the easy riding to toss down some fuel and water. I was also passed by two guys on single speeds who were geared spot-on, not like me spinning my nuts off. This of course lead to the chase and me eventually passing these guys on the technical terrain once again. Moving well and solid, I kept a solid pace and was psyched that my final lap was almost over. Just before popping out once again into the power line cut and heat, Beej and little Will blasted me with a shot of heat-slaying water which revived my drive to finish strong. As I pushed up the final hill some fella on a geared bike decided that he needed to pass me for some reason. Whatever I thought; I’m not racing you anyway. I then decided to go ahead and give it to him since he wanted it, and I pushed hard and made the fella about have a coronary getting across the line as we sprinted the last 100 yards.

Special thanks to Mark for his DNF. Without you buddy, I’d have gotten 4th. Your 3rd at the Farmhouse Classic 100 the day before was a lame excuse…Pappy was out racing and finished and he’s like 6 times your age. The Ethos crew killed it as usual with 7 podiums. Awesome work fellas!

All in all a good time on my home turf. Had I been geared right I’d have had a better finish time, but probably not a better place. I’m just not fast, but I do like to ride bikes.

Blazing Saddles...

2011-07-12T11:09:00.000-07:00

Had a killer ride on Sunday (as you loyal fans now knowingly observe as Dirt Church) with my Cousin Brad at Swope. It was blazing hot but we had a killer time riding all that is Swope. Phase 4 is a great addition with some drops, bumps and flowing single track. We were the first car in the lot and when we left there were 20. Swope IS a big deal. Get there, ride and enjoy.

Sunday it's going to be over 100 degrees. I suggest you all get your fat asses over to Shawnee Mission Park for the Sunday afternoon weight-loss program, also known as Shawnee Mission Mayhem. I know I'll be there, because I tend to do battle best in the dire pit of hell, and this race and the forcasted weather might just serve it up good. Hope to see you there!

Here's the course...looks prime!

Mountains of Fun...

2011-07-07T08:52:00.000-07:00

Dave and Burnsey enjoying a hike at the Shambala Mountain Center

4th of July weekend was nothing but good times for my wife and I. We headed out to Colorado for a few days to visit our pal Dave, who is recovering from surgery - as well as visiting a handful of other friends we enjoy the company of. I'm not going to elaborate since I did not do any riding while we were there, but I did manage to drink more than my share of beer, climb some Granite in RMNP and do some good hikes. Someday I will live in the mountains.

Burnsey's Garage Sale...

2011-06-24T08:37:00.000-07:00

I have a bunch of bike related goods for sale HERE. I'll add to the list as I find more items and have the time. Enough stuff to build a few bikes. I might even get the motivation to take some photos of the goods soon...

Swope with the Crew...

2011-06-23T19:32:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it feels SO good to hurt. The pain of crawling off my office chair and onto my bike at the best trail system in the Midwest to ride with good pals is worth it. The Manimal, Dave and I made short work of everything at Swope, both ways - all pushing single speeds. We even enjoyed a short game of mountain bike chinese fire-drill action; switching bikes to see how each differs in feel and performance. It was cool to ride Dave's Niner carbon frame. Feels really nice. Jesse's Stumpy was sweet too. If you have not been to Swope to ride, do it. If you are traveling across the country on I-70 and need a break to ride, do it. Kansas City's finest trail. Post ride there had to be 30 cars and many groups of post-ride peeps tossing back cold beers and telling stories of there adventures. A real scene for sure. We chose the comfort of Dave's porch for our beer consumption. Good times.

The Wolf & The Medallion

2011-06-23T10:21:00.000-07:00

The Wolf & The Medallion from Jeremy Collins on Vimeo.

A great friend, A must see...July 23rd at the Nelson Atkins Museum of Art, Kansas City, Missouri.

Custom Frame - Silent Auction...

2011-06-20T11:16:00.000-07:00

Hello to all the Yahoos out there in Cyber Land. Today you have the opportunity to selflessly help out one of my dear friends by bidding on this sweet Vicious Cycles Monolith Single Speed Frame.

Here's the deal; My buddy Dave is going in for surgery TODAY to have a tumor removed. At the age of 21 he had cancer, fought and beat it. Just over ten years later he's back in the ring, fighting again. Dave is much like we dream to be; Adventurous, traveler, life loving and never says no to a challenge. Dave has no insurance and no money. He needs help and won't ask for it!

What's going to happen is this; I'm selling my Vicious frame (a $1,400.00 value) to the highest bidder via silent auction. I will cover shipping costs. EVERY PENNY you bid goes straight to Dave to help fund his battle against cancer. This is the very least I can try to do for my brother. If you know him or not, he is worth it, so do it!

If you have a facebook account you can check out his updated status HERE.

About the frame;

Vicious Cycles Monolith Single Speed Frame size L

Reynolds 853 steel
EBB
Team Paint
Sterling Silver Head Badge
Excellent Condition

Specs are HERE

Here are a few photos of the bike built-up as I've had it for only a few months now...

All you have to do for the silent auction is email me at climbing_guides@hotmail.com with your bid and contact info. If you are NOT in the continental USA, You'll have to help me with the shipping charges over $50 (seems fair to me). I'll post up the winner of the bidding asap. I will be in Denver next weekend to see Dave and hope to bring him a check at that time. If I am getting a really great response from YOU folks, I might let the bidding go a little longer. If I do not get generous enough bids, I will cancel the auction and head to ebay for round two. I'm not gonna cheap-out on my pal; you don't cheap out on him either, please. If you don't want the frame, but would like to help, you can donate on the facebook page link above. I'll keep you posted.

Please feel free to contact me at the above email address with any questions/concerns! THANK YOU in advance for bidding. You do make a difference, no matter what your momma tells you...

Phunky Phat...

2011-06-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

I've been working WAAAAAAAAAAAAY too much lately. I have not been able to ride and it's killing me. I finally got the Monkey 98% built-up and took the maiden voyage into work this morning. I have to say that it's a fun ride with the Big Apple 2.35 tires and the comfy Mary Bars. Turning 34x16 might be a bit light for some folks, but if you had to ride the Lawrence Hill to get home like I do, you'd think twice before gearing up any further. Smooth rolling and fun. Let the mileage begin, no excuses now, I officially have a Road Bike.

EDIT 12:36 P.M.: IT'S RAINING CATS AND DOGS, THUNDERING LIKE MAD AND THERE'S A FAIR BIT OF LIGHTNING;. ALL THE MAKINGS FOR AN AWESOME RIDE HOME. THINKING NAKED OR JUST IN MY UNDIES, SWIM CAP AND GOGGLES...

The Proof is in the Pudding...

2011-06-15T23:05:00.000-07:00

More SSUSA11 action for you bitches!!!

Sorry you missed out :(

SSUSA - Boulder - June 2011 from Barry Reese on Vimeo.

KC Cup...

2011-06-12T20:23:00.000-07:00

< Mark Jesse>

Speeding Jesus

The Manimal

The Kid

Good times at the KC Cup with most of the Ethos Team ready to throw down. I successfully fulfilled my requirements/goals when I race; "Finished, Not Last". To add I prefer "Top 10" and "Had a Helluva Good Time". I succeeded in those also. Guess that sums it up to a good day riding bikes on a kick ass trail. Thanks to Heartland and all of the peeps who made this great local event happen...with style.

Results are HERE

Sunshine Daydream...

2011-06-11T15:20:00.000-07:00

Greasecar...

2011-06-10T08:50:00.000-07:00

I'm still sporting the VW Eurovan for road trips and family adventures, but when it comes to commuting or driving around town to ride some dirt, the TDI is my new go-to vehicle. The VW Golf TDI is converted to run off straight waste vegetable oil, solely obtained and recycled from Chipotle. Chipotle is as psyched as I am that we are able to get me too the races all while saving space in the landfill and my wallet! If you want more info on how [this] works, feel free to shoot me a line, or catch me at the next race event - which just happens to be the Missouri State Championships this Sunday at Landahl. Hope to see you there! Yahoo!!!

Project Monkey...

2011-06-10T08:20:00.001-07:00

In an ever expanding and ongoing quest to maintain some level of fitness and be green, I am building up a Surly Karate Monkey to use as a Single Speed commuter to and from work, the liquor store and rides with the family. I am trying to figure out if I want to run the Mary Bars (shown) or try out some Dirt Drops. Any recommendations/comments for a grocery-getter commuter as far as which of these two bars to run and why? I'm pretty close on this build, just awaiting my tires; Schwalbe Big Apple 2.35's to arrive and this beast will be rolling. I plan to do full fenders, racks and panniers in the future. I'm pretty psyched. Between this bike and my new Greasecar, I should be traveling for minimal dollars and using almost zero gas, ever!